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I was sat in the tree in the park getting away from everyone and everything. Flashbacks of being at the hospital rushed through me. It had really bad security and might as well of been prison. It was hard really hard being in that place no one understood me I didn't have one friend for two years I had no one my age to speak to it was hard. There were days I couldnt even remeber because I had taken my pills. Gradually I made my way to the top of the pact, meaning that when someone saw me they wouldn't even make eye contact. I always looked a state, pale, my bright blues eyes were dim and lost, my blonde hair was always down and looking disgusting. It took them a year to give me a bobble because they thought I would kill myself. My room, there wasn't even a mirror. Just a bed with one pillow that felt like a rock, the mattress was springy and there was only a sheet. The only other thing that was in the room was a chair and a bedside table. They gave me a notebook and pen also a year into me being there. Not wanting me to be suicidal. The only mirror was in the bathroom and a lock permanently on the door, I would have to bang on the door if I needed the toilet or a drink of water. There were set meal times. It was horrid I'm glad I'm out of that place if only Hayes understood the shit I had to go through. I wish my dad believed me at the time so I didn't even have to go through with it. I was never aloud visitors on visiting days because apparently it would break down my recovery. I missed everyone but after the first six months I didn't feel anything any more that's when I started to fight back and everyone became scared of me even the nurses. They were glad when I left but it took me a while after to regain feelings and friends. The fact that Blake is my only friend explains it. See I say that the girls at school are fakes or bitches or slags but that's only because they looked at me weirdly when I came back from the hospital, I didn't get along with anyone but Blake she knew the real me that I was set up because she knew when I lied. But she told me everyone got scared of me because I looked stronger and scarier and because I was the fucked up mental girl. I just wish that someone was in my position right now to understand my past and everything I have been through. If only the person closest to me understood me and what I have gone through.

Why doesn't Hayes understand?

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