Cross My Heart // Harry Styles

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GWEN'S POV:

Harry took a deep breath, and took my hands with both of his, and began to speak, in a really shaky voice.

"From the first time I laid my eyes on you Gwen, I loved you. I didn't know it yet, but all the feelings were there in that first few seconds, when I looked into your bruised, battered, sad eyes. Even through all that, I could see beauty. There was no mistaking it. It shined through all the shades of purple, blue and yellow on you face, and it got to me. And your eyes.....the sadness I saw inside them. It was unlike anything I'd ever seen before. I was mesmerized by the haunting look inside them. I saw a battered girl, who needed love. Care. A friend. Who needed to leave that place, as soon as possible, or she wouldn't last much longer.

When you disappeared behind the door, I put my hands against it, and stood there, catching my breath, Gwen. I had to see you again. I had to help you. And I made up my mind right then to help you leave your life of pain.

I thought I was doing it for you. So I could save a soul. Save this poor, sad girl. Be a hero. To know that I had done something RIGHT in life, for once. Something GOOD.....

But after seeing you again that very night, and feeling your frail, bruised body in my arms as I rocked you...how you gradually let yourself mold against my body and trust me, even though it went against everything you knew of your world to trust me like that...I knew....I knew that I was doing it for selfish reasons. I was saving you, for ME. I needed you. I loved you.

I still couldn't admit it to myself yet, but I knew. The feelings I felt in my mind and through my body were unlike anything I'd ever felt in my entire life, Gwen.

I was hooked.

Addicted.

I wanted to save you, so that there might be the slightest possible chance that you might somehow learn to love me back.

My days were a blur of boredom and mediocrity, as the hours passed by one by one, slower than I'd ever known, until it was time to finally see you again.

And then, I'd find myself holding you again, each time, seeing you open up a tiny bit more, until I could tell you trusted me with your life.

I still tried to deny my feelings for you as I visited you every single day in the hospital.

And when you woke up....my entire world changed. I knew I could never let you go. I knew I had to be in your life, somehow....as much as you'd possibly let me be. As close as I could possibly be to you.

And every single day, I fought myself. Oh, how I fought myself, Gwen. I told myself it wasn't right to love you. You weren't ready. I tried to tell myself that you were too mentally scarred to get involved too deeply with. But yet, I kept finding myself looking into your eyes, ready to take you in my arms and shout to the world that I loved you.

As you remember, I couldn't stay away from you. I started losing control. I kept letting my lips touch yours. "Just once", I'd tell myself. "It's alright....just once."

And that started turning into more....

Soon, I found myself living my life, and you were in it now. In my world. In my flat. Discovering the world that you'd missed out on for years and years. All I thought about was showing you things you missed. Things you'd love to see. I still do that even now. Only the world I was showing you got WAY WAY bigger in the past four months. Haha....

Every beautiful sunset you'd take in, from a foreign land, I watched you. Every exotic animal we'd encounter, I watched you. Every ocean we dipped our feet into...I watched you. All that beauty in all this world....I only watched YOU. There was NOTHING that was more beautiful in the entire world to me, than seeing YOU, taking in the beauty of the entire world.