The Consequences {Jacob Black}

Chapter XI

I didn't see Jake the rest of the day. I wasn't going to lie; I was glad. I was so... I didn't know what I was. I wanted to say that I was confused because of what he'd said, but I wasn't. I understood that he couldn't be around me anymore because of the decisions that I made and the things that I'd said. But at the end of the day, I was someone that he cared about. And Jake was more loyal than any labrador. So at the end of the day, if I ever really needed him, he would be there. So I didn't know what I felt, but I knew that it hurt.

Bella was sitting on my bed when I walked into the house. I just wanted to scream at her and shove her out my door. "What do you want Bella?" I asked.

"I saw Jake today," she said. Yeah, so had I. I just looked at her expectantly. "He didn't even want to talk to me," she continued. "And then when I was giving Quil a ride home, he said that Jake had joined that gang that we saw cliff diving." I nodded. "He's scared of Sam, Ryanne. Why would he join them?"

"I don't know Bella, but Billy knows about it. And Billy wouldn't let Jake do anything bad, I promise you that." It was the best I had to offer, to Bella and to me.

"Well, I told Charlie about them," she said. Why would she do that? And why was she still calling him Charlie? He's our father! I took a deep breath and reined in my temper. "He said he'll let Billy know that he's going to be watching the gang. I don't want anything to happen to Jake." Naturally, Jake was her main concern.

I wondered, sometimes, if Bella saw just how selfish she was. She had convinced herself that Jake was her main concern. It was like she lived in some fantasy world where she was so self-sacrificing, she didn't see how she appeared to me. I knew that she wasn't as concerned about Jake as she was about herself. Jake had made her happier and healthier than she had been since the day Edward left. She wasn't concerned about him; she was worried about the only person who made her feel better leaving her. I had heard her talking about him in her sleep. She would call him her Jacob and her personal sun. I think she completely forgot about the part where Jacob was a human being. He had feelings, he had a heart. And he was letting Bella trample both of those. "Bella, I am telling you that Billy wouldn't let Jake do anything stupid. He's lost his wife, his legs, and his two daughters. He wouldn't lose Jake, too," I promised.

"What if Billy's wrong?" she asked. Was she seriously going to question a man who had raised his three children on his own from a wheelchair? "What if he thinks that this is something good but it's actually really, really bad?" she asked. I just continued staring at her. "I mean, just because you don't care enough about Jake-"

"Enough!" I screamed. "I care about Jake, Bella. I care about him more than I care about anyone else in this world. He is my best friend! He is the only person I had growing up, besides Dad. I'm glad that he's important to you too, I really am. I'm glad that you've found someone who can make you forget that Edward left you," I said. She flinched at his name. "I'm still going to say his name, Bella. You need to get over it." I paused, knowing that I was being mean, but not caring anymore. "I am glad that you are getting back to normal, Bella. But I can guarantee you that I care more about Jake than you ever will." She opened her mouth again, but I interrupted her. "You want to know why he isn't allowed to talk to us?" She nodded. "That car accident that his mom was in; it wouldn't have happened if I hadn't called Sarah and Billy. Dad couldn't pick me up from ballet and told me to call them. They were only at the intersection because I needed a ride home."

I sank down to the ground and blinked a few times. "Jake and I were arguing about cartoons and I couldn't just let him win. Sarah turned around to tell us enough. Jake always won. I could've just accepted defeat and lost; again. But no, I continued to fight. Sarah yelled and Jake, I don't even remember what he said. I don't think he remembers what he said, but he talked back. Billy turned around to yell at Jake and the truck," I stopped and took a deep breath. "There was a drunk driver and he t-boned us. He hit Sarah's side. We were pushed back until the car hit a light pole. The paramedics said if Jake hadn't grabbed me, I'd be dead." I looked at the dreamcatcher and licked my lips. "I got in a fight with Jake's sister and told her some bad things, Bella. And Billy won't allow Jake to talk to us because of the things that I said. So just," I felt a tear roll down my cheek. "So just get out of my room and leave Jake alone, okay?"