MOST EVERY GIRL CONTAINS THE DEPTHS OF HELL INSIDE OF THEM They might appear kind but when their monthly visitor decides to come ITS LIKE HELL BREAKS LOOSE
I swear to goi, this so gonna be a rant in which girl's should probably only read lmao it's 5am and I'm bored
SO HEY yeah I was that dumbass who was like "I want my period so bad" *looks up tips to help period come* I WAS SO FUCKING IDIOTIC DANI YOU SHOULDVE JUST BASKED IN THE TIME WHEN YOU COULD GO THROUGH EACH MONTH WITHOUT YOUR UTERUS KILLIMG ITSELF FOR A WEEK
I sweaR I CANT EVENNN and then October 2nd 2015 (I was 12 lmao) DEATH ARRIVED AT MY DOORSTEPS I was so shocked I started screaming and crying and my mom was in the shower and she was like "WHAT THE FUCK SWEETIE HOLD ON GIVE ME A SECOND AND ILL GET YOU ANYTHING YOU NEED"
I WAS SHOOK SO SHOOK LIKE SHOOK TO THE CORE
MY older sister was like "stop crying u little bitch"
I DIDNT THINK IT WOJLD BE SO MESSY TO BE HONEST
but it's been like a year and 5 months that I've had my period (and I was regular right from the start which is rare???) and that isn't a long time because I have 40 more years of bleeding to go
BUT IVE REALLY GOTTEN CONTROL OF IT Or so I think...
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well at least I've gotten the grasp of it so that I can go to sleep knowing that I probably will get my period in the morning but I don't like do anything about BUT I always seem to wake up (without an alarm) WITH ENOUGH TIME TO MAKE IT to the restroom before it starts And then I pop some pain meds, layer on socks and crawl back into bed
LIKE ACTUALLY Aunt Flo is expected to arrive in a week or so And I realized it because I started crying over an elephant with a fake leg It was so random, that shit doesn't make me cry but I was like JSHSBDJXUS SNIFFLE
and boob pain is just FUCKING GREAT LIKE REAL FUCKING FUNNY MOTHER NATURE it's like "oh? My boobs got bigger?" And then you move slightly AND you actually have to curl into a ball on the floor my bras are always a little bit too big because a size down is too small, BUt With period boobs I feel like I go from a 36 b to a 40 d It's crayyyyYYy
Me: just chill out its period boobs Also me: oh my god... I probably have breast cancer...
ANF AHAHA RELATABLE I'm actually a 13 year old fetus and haven't even held hands with a boy but somehow when my period is like a day late I think I'm pregnant "IM THE NEXT MARY Y'ALL" Or "maybe I sat on a chair in public that like a guy sat on and maybe he had jizz on his pants and then it got on me and OHMYGOD I WAS WEARING A SKIRT that's what happened, I'm screwed." ITS SO STUPID SO STUPID
My family thinks I'm insane though Because all the females on my moms side have had a past of horrible and excruciating cramps and sometimes I don't even need to take medicine for mine And my mom is like "???how u gud bud?" It's simple
Me: *cramps hit* oh shit I need medicine *looks around for pill bottle* *doesnt see one* "Okay Dani cmon you're a woman, you are Jesus in woman form, you can power through this, just watch turtle videos to get your mind off of it"
And oh my god I hate when my water weight starts going crazy and like the the day before my period I always step on the scale because it's genuinely funny I step on it and I'm 115, I step on it later and I'm now 110 and then I'm 120 and 2 hours later I step on it and I'm 116 and then I'm fucking 109 LIke is my body on crack behind my back?
Also when I start reading smut, it's because it's like a week before my period I mean u can't deny that u don't read smut before and on your period because u totally do
#danitheworlddhorniestchildever IM JOKING That's bad But is it the truth? Catch me on dr. Phil ON MONDAY, October 9th at 8:00pm
Well it's 6am now and I'm sleepy And yeah good night ya turckles
