Messed up...for Life

Hi Again...

Comment on why i put the picture, what it means in the story!  

Em's P.O.V.

"Good Morning beautiful!" I hear Fla says in a joyful voice as i open my eyes. "Morning" I mumble.  I look around and see there is some light outside. "What time is it?" I ask. "It is 5:30 am" He says as he looks at his phone and heads to my closet, he probably looking for a few of my clothes. I lay back down, I can't believe i slept for so long. I stretch and yawn only for my yawn to be cut. "Emily! Get your ass in here!" I'm confused at first but then remember i didn't lock my drawer that contain all my knifes and blades along with night-locks and other pills and mainly my notebook that has my suicide plans. "Shit!" i curse and run to the closet. "What is this?!" Fla yells clearly pissed off, he was holding my notebook a bottle of pills. "Why ask if you already know." I say with a bit of attitude. I grab the notebook and my pills ant toss them back in before closing the drawer. I hear the closet door open again. "What is going on?" Asks Brandon and Evan who were standing in the closet door. "Why do you have that!?" Fla yells at me ignoring Brandon and Evan. "None of your business!" I yell back, instantly regretting it as i feel a sting in my left cheek. "Do Not Yell At Me! You Know Better!" He yells and pushes me back making me fall with a soft 'thun'. Memories of my father run over to my mind making me slowly curl in a ball and crawl back slowly. "Stop. Open the drawer. Now." Fla orders as he pulls me up. I back up til my back was in the wall. He rubs his face. "Please open it Skyden. I want to help you. I thought you where doing better only to find out you have suicide plans. Open. The. Drawer. Now." He says pausing after every word. I shake my head no. "Are you going to make me open it?" He asks and i shake my head softly again. "Sky all i am asking is for you to open the drawer. I already saw what you have in there. Please open it and we can talk about it. Please." he says. Brandon and Evan being more confused than ever. Alex and Matt had joined. Evan walks towards the drawer wanting to open it yet failing. "Why and how is it locked?" He asks me. I try to find the words. "I have some things in there and with a special key." I mumble. "open it please." Brandon says. "No, you guys should go back to bed." i say. Fla huffs. "Why are you still suicidal? I'm sorry i'm asking in front of them but i think it is important for them to know, and about the key your not very smart you used the same one for your locker at the gym. Remember I have a copy." he asks. "I'm not willing to talk about it." I say and stand in front of the drawer. "Come here." Brandon orders as he walks into the closet, I shake my head no. "Sky. I don't know what i should do. You know i have to report this, yet i don't think its going to do any good since you hate hospitals, doctors, cops, rules, laws anything along the lines. I could either shut my mouth and deal with this myself or talk to Blake, Ty, and Ana; you would probably finish going back to El Paso for a few days." Fla says and i look down. "Emily let me see your eyes" Matt says slowly and calmer than ever... I recognize that kind of calmness. I don't look up as i feel myself become numb. "No." I say and open the drawer grabbing a blade and pills before Fla could stop me. He know the gym key and this on is not the same. I place the bottle of pills and blade in my hoodie pocket as i try to walk out. They all try to stop me, none accomplished. There banging in the bathroom door as i open the bottle of pills. I look at my shaking hands. I can here them banging i know that Fla wont take long on kicking the door open. I take a fist of pills and put them all in my mouth, not caring of the taste. I chew every fist of pills that followed after. I swallow each and every single one of the pills in the bottle before grabbing my blade and sit in the toilet top. I slide my wrist over and over. The yells and begs become silent as all i can see is my arms full of blood. I stand up with help of the wall walking in front of what used to be a mirror, yes the one i punched not long ago. I raise my shirt and cut over and over none stop until once again red is the only color i can see. I hear a thun in the door as it startles me. I pull up my sweats and do the same as in my arms and stomach. i feel my eyes closing. The door open to revel Edwin. Fla is no where to be found. Edwin pulls me into his arms and carries me. I think we are going to my bed but Ed takes me out my room and out the door with Brandon, Alex, Matt and Evan behind him. I'm put into the back seat Brandon goes up front and Alex next to me. Fla is driving. I close my eyes. I feel tiredness start taking over. "Don't let her sleep." I hear Brandon's voice followed by an "okay" from Edwin. I refuse to open my eyes. I'm being shaken. "Sis come on don't sleep. Come on baby girl stay with me." Ed says. "Its not working." he says to the rest. "Emily Wake Up or i'm going to take you to the real hospital. Wake up." I hear Fla's voice. I try to open my eyes but it don't seem to work so instead i move my hand. "She moved her hand, shes awake." Edwin tells the rest. I feel a hand on my arm making me flinch. "She's bleeding like hell; it wont stop." Alex tells i don't know who. "Do you guys have a first aid kit?" Brandon asks. "We have the first aid kit under my seat" Fla notifies. I feel Ed lean for it. I slowly loose consciousness. "Em Stay Awake Motherfucker." I hear Fla say but its too late darkness has taken over.