The Dark

Chapter 33: Blindness Isn't A Weakness

Chapter 33: Blindness Isn't A Weakness

I ran as fast as I possibly could back to my room, I couldn't stand the stench of his presence all over my body. With my heart leaping out of my chest and the adrenaline running profusely through every inch of my body I felt the power to charge through these hallways as fast as possible without being held back by anyone. I was given alarmed looks from the servants who were roaming the halls completing their jobs some even called out to me saying "Princess are you alright?" some even calling "Do you need help?" but I was blocking every single one of them out as I finally made it back to my room. I plummeted on through slamming the door behind placing my weight heavily against it gasping for air. All I could hear was the pounding of my heart increasing in volume filling the empty silence in the room. That's when I heard a knock on the door behind me making me jump in fright "Miss Willow are you okay in there?" It was Livy, now all of a sudden she came back to talk to me probably due to the reaction which channelled all the way through the halls. But I couldn't find my voice, I felt I was choking on air trying to find some to actually let me speak "I'm...I'm fine Livy thank you," but the shaky tone to my voice wasn't going to be very convincing for her "Are you sure? Can I come in?" though I was shaking my head at her words but no sound would come out from my voice all until I was able to gain just enough air to speak again "I'm fine Livy trust me, come back later," there must have been hesitation behind the door because no sound came her way for a while. "Alright, I'll see you later to prepare you for dinner," I nodded just as I heard her begin to walk away from the door. I slid down the door slowly as the images of what just happened spiralled through my brain. I kept re-watching as he trapped me up against the wall, how he placed his head directly against my skin...his lips trailing all the way down my neck, his hands tracing down each of my legs, lifting them so I was pressed against his chest. I didn't go any further, I slapped myself in the head multiple times in the head; I didn't want to revisit his hands making their way underneath my dress, I didn't want to feel violated for a second time. What I hated most about this was how I let it happen? I should have been stronger and got him off me but I couldn't do it, the pressure he held against me was just unbeatable I couldn't push him off and now I have to live with this, this feeling of being touched and groped by...by him.

I pushed myself away from the door lifting my hands to the back of my dress unzipping it as I travelled through the door into the bathroom. I let the dress slip down away from me I took everything else off; I pulled open the shower door stepping inside instantly turning on the water and let it touch my skin rapidly. I rested my arm up against the wall letting my head resting against it as the water fell on my head. From the corners of my eyes I could see the little droplets of water fall from my face and hair but I just kept staring down at the ground. Closing my eyes shut as deep as I possibly could trying to erase the moment from my brain only knowing that it would stay there for a very long time. First I get beaten up by him and burned and now I have this happen by him...what was to come next? I couldn't contain it much longer, I could feel the tears burn inside my eyes and the wrenching feeling in my stomach was letting lose as the hunger of tears were finally about to be unleashed. I felt my back lean against side wall of the shower and as I slid down the wall the tears fell like a rainfall down my face. I pulled my knees up into my chest and I buried my head inside them still letting the tears fall. This was all my fault, everything was all my fault, I let this happen I let everything happen because I never do anything to stop it because I'm weak. People keep saying that I'm strong, yes I'm strong but not because of me but because of my powers that's the reason why I'm strong not for anything else. If I was strong I would have prevented these circumstances from taking place, I wouldn't have had to feel his hands trace their way through my body I wouldn't have had to feel his lips against my skin, I wouldn't have to live with this feeling and I wouldn't be punishing myself right now. I could drown in my tears and the shower water if I wanted to, I did want to and that was the devastating part but if I did that then what sort of person would I be. I'd be proving my thoughts right, I'd be proving to myself that I am weak when I want to be stronger than I am.