//IronDad and SpiderSon Oneshots//

No! NO PETER NO. BAD!//27

Aye, this involves puke. If any of y'all are triggered by it, you don't have to read this. :)

To say all things were wonderful... would be a complete and utter overstatement. Things were not wonderful or good. Things were horrible. Bad. Terrible. No good. Other synonyms for bad.

Peter held a Febreeze bottle in his hand and closely inspected the bottle. He hit his lip in concentration as he searched the labels.

"Hmm..." Peter hummed.

Tony walked in, glancing over at Peter holding a Febreeze bottle close to his face.

"What... Peter what are you doing?" Tony questioned, looking more than confused.

"An experiment..." Peter said vaguely explaining what he was going to do.

"What... kind of experiment?" Tony further questioned, slowly walking towards the boy. Very slow.

"An experiment..."

"That doesn't explain anything." Tony deadpanned. Peter didn't care and just kept searching.

"Hmm... lethal to spiders... I wonder....?" Peter read out loud. Tony instantly knew what was going to happen.

"PETER NO!" Tony yelled and lunged for the bottle.

Peter was already spraying himself.

Peter coughed and coughed and then started hacking. Tony tentatively reached out to help Peter cough. Tony patted his back and Peter kept hacking his lungs out, well, not literally, but you know what I mean.

"You good?" Tony asked, supporting Peter as he KEPT COUGHING WHY IS THERE NOT OTHER WORDS FOR COUGHING PLEASE COMMENT SYNONYMS.

"Blegh." Peter mumbled. "Not a good-cough-idea."

"Yeah, no. I'm gonna bring you to the infirmary and Dr. Bruce'll help you, alright?"

"Okay."

Tony picked Peter up and held him in his arms. Peter started to feel bile rise up in his throat.

"T-Tony." Peter shattered. Tony looked down, concerned.

"What's wrong?"

"Bile."

Tony hadn't run faster to a bathroom since the last party he had with around five bottle of wine in his system.

~~~

Peter, in short, felt like he was throwing up his stomach. He did not enjoy anything whatsoever. Blegh.

"Okay, this sucks." Said the puking teen. Tony was crouched next to him patting his back.

"Yeah this is why you don't spray Febreeze on yourself. It said it was lethal to spiders and you obviously have spider genes now, so what did you think would happen?" Tony huffed.

"I'm a spider-human thing maybe it wouldn't have affected me!" Peter glared up at the billionaire from his spot on the toilet.

"Seriously man!"

"Never say man again."

"Never spray Febreeze on yourself again."

"You got me there."

"I know I did. That's the point."

Peter pffted and rolled his eyes. He widened them as another round of puke crawled its way up his throat. Tony pressed this lips into a thin line, but nevertheless rubbed Peter's back.

"Never again." A a ball of sweat glistened in Peter's face and dropped down his neck. Tony cringed at it feelin' a little grossed out by it but he was okay doesn't matter. Tony grabbed a towel and dabbed in his neck.

"Thanks." Peter wheezed.

"Yep." Tony mindlessly answered.

"Never... again." Peter mumbles to himself as his cheeks filled up with icky bile. (Sue me for saying icky I have the mind of a five year old.) Peter's face went green and his eyes bulged.

"Not again." Tony sighed. Peter puked his guts again and in between panting he said a small sorry.

"Lesson learned?"

"Lesson... definitely learned..."

"What are you not going to do?"

"Spray Febreeze on myself..."

"What's gonna happen next time?"

"I'm not going to spray Febreeze on myself."

"What do you think will happen if this happens again?"

"I'll puke..."

"Do you want that to happen?"

Peter hung his head in shame. "No..."

"No. Febreeze." Tony said with a tone of finality. Peter whimpered when he felt another round come up with throat.

"Not fun...."

A/N: The crack chapter is taking longer than expected. So, what better than to quickly make chapters to make up for it?

Question: Would anybody like a face reveal? This is gonna work like the poll chapter, only comment on the one you want, just so it's easier to count( I'm lazy) "Or" is not an option.

Yes

No