The School Idol's Roommate [BL]

His second-best

Liam was in a bad mood.

He went straight to bed after he left Aki outside. He had been staring at the ceiling, organizing his very disorganized thoughts. He was irritated with Zy, with Aki, and with himself.

It was bad enough that he acted greedily and yes, jealous ever since Zy came. It only worsened when he had to watch Aki and Zy interact. It killed him to see Aki so concerned over his friend.

But the final blow was when they were at the hills. The way Aki and Zy talked and joked with each other was like a needle to Liam's heart. They had conversed with so much ease and closeness — something Liam had envied from long before.

Watching Aki and Zy together was something Liam had done a lot of times in the past, mostly at the bar. Every time he saw them, Aki radiated with love as if the entire world revolves around his friend. Aki could not see past Zy, only him at the center of his universe.

That was the thing. Liam could tell that Aki loved Zy with all his heart, but he could not say the thing for Zy. This guy enjoyed the attention, whether he admits it or not. But he showed that kind of attention to everyone else. It was clear to Liam that Aki was part of that 'everyone.'

There was only one time when Zy looked just like Aki, and that was when they were with Drew. Despite not knowing their names before, except for Aki, Liam knew of their tangled relationship.

After watching them night after night, all Liam ever wanted was to shake Aki and tell the other guy to stop. Liam understood Aki's expressions. He understood them too well. It was the face of a person willing to be the second-best in the life of the person he loved.

When Nancy chose Warren over him, more than feeling betrayed, Liam pitied himself. He was not and would never be good for anyone. He made himself believe that he would never be someone's special someone. He was content being the supporter. And support was something he was willing to give to Aki.

He was okay not to be with Aki. He was okay being the number one supporter, the person who claps happily in the background. Aki did not have to choose Liam as long as Aki was happy. Liam was content on the sidelines.

Until he knew how Aki's lips taste like. How Aki's body squirmed inside Liam's arms. How Aki would snuggle to Liam's side every morning. Every day, with Aki beside him, Liam became greedy little by little, his resolve to stay as friends dissolving bit by bit.

He had to contain himself all day, giving Aki and Zy space for their friendship and keeping his jealousy in check.

Was it wrong to want more of his roommate? He had an inkling that Aki liked him, even just a little. But when Liam was with Zy, his confidence deflated. He was reminded of his role as the outsider, the onlooker. The one who would never be Aki's choice.

Liam grabbed a pillow and hugged it with all of his might. He was doing so well, but his mouth had to ruin everything. That horrible talk just had to happen.

He pulled an arm over his eyes. He shouldn't have said that.

'You are so stupid Liam. In more ways than one.'

He had no more desire to lie to himself nor deny what he felt. He no longer wanted to be the second-best. He wanted to be Aki's one and only.

He rolled on his stomach. He missed Aki, but he did not know how to make things better. The look on Aki's face was too much to look at.

'What have you done?'