Beautiful Disasters- Hawks x OC

Chapter 56

Mariko and Keigo had entered a sort of "honeymoon phase." Their relationship had shifted months ago, but they had both been hesitant in taking the next step because of how important their friendship was. Now that that step had been taken; it was like a dam had burst and all of their previously suppressed emotions were pushing forward aggressively.

That was why Hawks nearly flipped his shit when Hayato came by the apartment telling her they had another mission.

"You can't go. You promised no sudden disappearances," was his automatic response.

Hayato raised an eyebrow, confused as to why she made that kind of promise when she knew the kind of job they had could require her to drop off the face of the earth pretty much at any given moment.

Mariko took his hand in hers and squeezed it reassuringly- it was the only thing keeping him tethered to common sense at this point.

"Well, technically it's not a sudden disappearance. The missions' not for another three weeks and she won't be leaving the country. I thought I'd tell you in advance this time 'cus I get it. Don't tell Araya though he wanted to wait again," he told them.

Mariko rolled her eyes at the ravenette's actions. "He's really serious about getting Keigo to join, isn't he?" she wondered.

"Thanks for that."

"Mari," the blonde interjected. He didn't like the sound of another mission at all, not to mention she was practically ignoring him at the moment.

The brunette looked over at him pleadingly. He needed to understand she wasn't going to drop this until the operation was over.

"The offer to join us is still on the table. You wouldn't be kept in the dark about the mission again and Araya will stop calling her out at the last second," Hayato offered.

"That shithead's been doing this on purpose?" Keigo growled angrily.

The taller male shrugged. "He's got his own way about getting what he wants."

He sighed in resignation, "Fine. I wanna talk to that bastard first though," he said crossing his arms.

Hayato smirked and nodded. "I'll set it up... here Mari," he said, handing the girl a folder. "All the info is in there. You know the drill have it-"

"Memorized before the mission. I know. Thanks for bringing it. Go back to your wife and child now," she said shooing him away.

The male laughed and nodded a goodbye to Hawks, who was still silently fuming.

Once the door closed, she made her way towards him. "You know I have to go, right?" she asked.

He glared at her. "I don't Mari. I don't know why this is so important. So what if she was your teammate before? You're not supposed to be an agent anymore Mari!" he exclaimed frustratedly.

Mariko stared at him thinking. Had she never fully explained the relationship between her and Mineko? It had never occurred to her that she would have to since she'd always been surrounded by people who already knew. Of course, Araya and Hayato wouldn't question her jumping back into the mission because to a certain degree, they shared the responsibility of what happened to her; Keigo didn't know though, he hadn't been in her life then. "You're right," she started. "I shouldn't need to be involved in this. I'm supposed to be a regular civilian living a quiet life here with you. But I can't do that while she's out there," she told him.

"Why not?" he asked. He wanted to know. He wanted to be let into the world she'd been trying to keep him out of. Why couldn't she just let other people handle it?

"Operation Blackpool- you read the redacted version didn't you?" she asked.

The male nodded.

"The original mission was to go in there and secure both Mineko and the laboratory completely. Sosa, Hayato, Aiko and I went in and as soon as I saw what was in there, I knew there was no way we could secure it." Her bright blue eyes dulled as she distanced herself emotionally from a past reality, "The things she'd created... If you can imagine a more primitive noumu it was as though she'd created an army of those. Floors upon floors upon floors of creatures that used to be people but had become so warped from her quirk and experiments they were monsters. They weren't strong, most were quirkless, but two things were consistent: one- they all bent to her every whim, complete obedience 100% of the time, and two- they were all in pain. Writhing in agony from whatever their bodies had been subjected to, others were going berserk in containment units. Maybe it wasn't the right call... but I made the call to blow everything up. Maybe it was because I wanted to put them out of their misery. Maybe it was because I was angry and wanted to destroy everything Mineko had created. Maybe it was because I wanted there to be no trace of her being evil... I don't know. But I do know that I had Araya create enough C-4 to bring down a block and told him to plant it on the first and sixth floors... he was my lieutenant at the time, so I told him to round up the others and get out. I would deal with Mineko on my own."

"You weren't planning on making it out that time, were you?" he asked weakly.

She smiled sadly at him and shook her head. "I wasn't."

"Why?" "Why did she think she was going to die? Why is she looking at me like that? Like it's okay?"

"Mineko Shimizu wasn't just my teammate Keigo. She was my sister, my mother, my best friend. She was the first person I could rely on, the first person I truly considered family. She was my whole world when I was a little kid in basic training. She saved my ass I don't know how many times... I let that person get kidnapped and tortured to the point of insanity, to the point of harming the people she'd sworn to protect... when you're in undercover work, there comes a point where you understand or realize that all it takes for you to fall to the wrong side is a little push. Just one thing could set you off. When we realized that we made a promise; we promised that if either one of us became people capable of mercilessly harming innocents, we would put each other out of our misery. She was so far gone she probably didn't remember it... but I did, I still do. That was why I had to be the one to kill her... and because I was the one who'd put her in that position, because my decisions put the person I loved most in the world in the one mindset she never wanted to be in, I thought it was only fair that I died along with her."

Keigo stared at her, gripping her hand tightly. Her expression already so distant he was scared she'd disappear before his eyes.

"I won't put myself in that position again," she told him, leaning her forehead against his. "I won't because I'm selfish. Because I want to be with you for as long as possible. Because to me, you're a blessing and I have no intention of throwing that away. Because to me, you're the most important person... but that doesn't mean I can break my promise. I can't ignore the fact that she's still alive, acting the way she is. I need you to understand that I have to be a part of this. I need to be the one to finish it, because it was my job to do so in the first place."

He grabbed her arm and pulled her into a tight hug. It physically pained him to know she'd suffered so much. She'd given up her youth to do the dirty work for a country that didn't acknowledge her existence. She'd experienced severe and long-lasting psychological trauma and was forcing herself to relive her greatest nightmare and would be left to lick her wounds alone again. She was the light of his life and deserved the world and he hated that she was putting herself in danger. He understood though, that this was something she had to do. The only thing he could do now, was support her.

"Thankyou," she whispered, burying his face in her chest, and gripping his shirttightly