Hello! I'm currently debating on whether I should continue this book since I'm failing my classes and I need to grade em up. I'll try to update at least once a week. Man has school been stressful since COVID started. At last, there's nothing I can currently do about that. Please take care and be safe, everyone!
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It's been a couple of days since what happened at Stohess. Everyone seems to have shaken it off that Annie was the Female Titan. You and Eren have been very distant ever since you snapped at him the other day. You cause him confusion and yourself a heartbreak.
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Flashback
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Eren had taken you out on a small date to the forest where he set up a nice picnic for the both of you. You both walked there holding hands as you had an eternal debate inside your head on whether you should continue to keep everything a secret from him.
After all, the last thing you wanted was to hurt him more than you already had. He seemed to truly love and care for you. All while you lied to his face.
"Hey y/n, you alright?" He asked pulling you away from your thoughts.
"Me? Oh yeah, I'm great. I'm just thinking..." You wouldn't have bought that but he seemed to respect your space.
That was another reason you loved him so much. He didn't push you to explain your feelings to him. He would simply wait until you were ready to tell him yourself.
As you both stared at the moon and the stars you finally made up your mind.
You could not longer keep this a secret from him. Or at least keep on letting him get this close to you. At the mere thought of the words that were about to leave your mouth, you felt hot tears run down your face.
"Y/n? What's wrong are you feeling ok?" He asked as he wiped the tears from your face carefully.
You pushed away his hands as he stared at you in confusion. More tears streamed down your face as you carefully chose your next words.
"I'm sorry, Eren... but... I can't be with you..."You whispered just loud enough for him to hear you. Your gaze was kept down the whole time. You felt as if you stared up at him you would surrender against his eyes.
Confess to him what you've done.
"Y/n? Are you sure you ok? This isn't like you? What do you mean... Do you not love me anymore?" He asked as you could hear his voice start to break. You didn't want to do this. You didn't want to hurt him. But this is the best.
For the both of you.
This is better for him.
"Don't you understand... I. Don't. Love. You." Your voice raised as you felt your heartbreak into a million pieces.
"Your not m-making any s-sense y/n... What happened? You d-don't love me?..." You burst into tears as you felt anger rise within you.
"Eren. Stop making this harder for me... please... just forget about me... find a woman who you CAN be with..." The mere thought of him with another woman made your heart shatter over and over again.
Gaining courage you slowly looked up to see that he was crying. His eyes reflected pure sadness and heartbreak. His lower lip was quivering as he just stared at you trying to find out if you were pulling a prank on him.
"And why can't you be with me? Y/n I love you... why are you doing this... what happened... no, what did I do to make you stop loving me." His voice was shaking and had a clear reflection of fear.
"GODDAMNIT EREN STOP! STOP MAKING THIS HARDER FOR ME! I DONT LOVE YOU! PLEASE GO FIND SOMEONE WHO DOES LOVE YOU AS MUCH AS YOU WILL TI THEM... please... just let me go..." Your fists pounded against his firm chest as you lowered your gaze again.
"No... not until you look me in the eyes and tell me that you don't love me... whatever the reason you are doing this for won't keep me away from you. Nothing can make me hate you. I love you... but if you don't love me then just tell me.. please..." You felt more tears run down your eyes as he ran his hand through your (h/c) hair.
You slowly brought your gaze up to meet his. His eyes were red and puffy, crystal tears running down his face as his teal eyes studied your (e/c) ones.
"Eren... I... I don't... I don't love you..." More tears cascaded down your face as your lips quivered. He averted his gaze down as you started to walk away.
"Y/n... why... what did I do to make you stop loving me... did I treat you wrong? Is that why you don't love me anymore... please just tell me what I did wrong... if it's because of my fights with Jean I'll try and stop fighting I promise I'll even get along with him" You stopped in your tracks as you tilted your head towards his direction while keeping your eyes on the ground.
"You did nothing wrong Eren... but you'll understand soon enough... I'm sorry." You whispered as you ran back to the girl's barracks.
Eren stayed in the forest as he cried while remembering your moments together. Hot tears flowed down his face as he quietly mumbled reassuring words to himself.
"I'm sorry y/n..." He whispered as his hands traveled to his hair as he started to yank on it.
"It's going to be ok..."
"She still loves you..."
When you arrived at the girl's barracks you ran straight towards the bathroom. Ignoring every person as you made your way into a bathroom stall where you locked yourself in and cried all the tears you held in while with Eren.
"Forgive me... Eren... but this is for the best... for you..." You whispered as you slowly slumped yourself on the floor.
After about half an hour of crying, you went to wash your face when you saw Christa waiting for you at the sinks.
"Y/n? Have you been crying..." She asked as she slowly approached you while you walk towards the sink to wash your face.
"Hm? Oh no I went out for a walk and got dirt stuck in my eye, is all." You lied as you started washing your face with cold water.
"Are you sure... if you need anyone to talk to I'm right here you know..." She told you while you
finished cleaning up.
"Yeah I know... thanks for your concern anyway but there's nothing wrong with me."You reassured her as you headed out the bathroom.
"No problem." She beamed as she went towards where Ymir was waiting for her at.
For the rest of the day, you avoided Eren and anyone who would ask you questions as to why you looked like you hadn't gotten proper sleep.
'Just calm down... you'll be home in no time...'
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Hello everyone! I'm sorry about the sad chapter I was just feeling pretty down today but I'm all better! Thank you all for the support and thanks for sticking with this trash of a book!
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YOU ARE READING
TRAITOR (E. Jeager)
Fanfiction"𝑇ℎ𝑒𝑟𝑒 𝑖𝑠 𝑎𝑙𝑤𝑎𝑦𝑠 𝑠𝑜𝑚𝑒 𝑚𝑎𝑑𝑛𝑒𝑠𝑠 𝑖𝑛 𝑙𝑜𝑣𝑒. 𝐵𝑢𝑡 𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑟𝑒 𝑖𝑠 𝑎𝑙𝑠𝑜 𝑎𝑙𝑤𝑎𝑦𝑠 𝑠𝑜𝑚𝑒 𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑠𝑜𝑛 𝑖𝑛 𝑚𝑎𝑑𝑛𝑒𝑠𝑠." Y/n L/n became a warrior candidate for Marley after her mother got sick with a strange diseas...
