You Never Asked (Completed)

The Inner Circle.

It was in the wee hours of the morning that Sid got up from the couch in the balcony. So this is how he had met Sana six years ago. He still remember every minute details of that night. She had just like that, gripped him and that grip has still not been loosened. He was helpless and powerless in front of her. His brain has been continuously telling him not to try. Because it's useless. But his heart is very strong headed. It is not ready to accept defeat. Sid walked to the bathroom and took a hot shower. Tears started flowing from his eyes. This is where he releases his pent up emotions most of the time.
Sana got up with a start. It was as if she has woken up in the hotel room under Sid's scrutinizing gaze. The memory of six years still afresh. But no. She was all alone in a hotel room in Jorhat. She got ready and came down to the dining hall. The other crew members greeted her. She told them to leave and be ready for the shoot. She warned they start the shoot as soon as they reach there as they don't want to make their host wait. Sid came to the dinning hall. Sana was waiting for them. She looked up from her mobile and their eyes met. Sid ignored her totally. The way they had parted yesterday, Sana knew it was going to be very difficult and awkward. But this is called rude. He asked for the juice and sat on the table in the far corner of the Hall. So this is how it is going to be. She so wished she was home. With her son. Sana suddenly felt homesick. She walked out of the dinning hall and called Sunita's number.
Sunita: Hello didi?? Kaise ho??
Sana: Mai thek hu Sunita. Tu kaisi hai?? Sab thek??
Sunita: Sab thek hai.
Sana: Zoro kaha hai??
Sunita: Vo yehi hai. Lo baat karo.
Zoro: Hello mama kaise ho??
Sana: Mai thek hu. Aap kaisi ho baby??
Zoro: I'm fine mama. Kya aap ro rahe ho??
Sana: Nahi to...
Zoro: Don't worry about me mama. I'm a big boy now and I can take good care of myself and when I grow up, I will take good care of you too.
Sana: Hayee mera baccha. I love you baby.
Zoro: I love you too
Sana saw Sid come out with Arun. He walked to the car not looking her way and went and sat in the passenger seat next to the driver, leaving Arun and Sana to take the back seat. He was wearing sun glasses and so Sana could not see his eyes. It's fine this way she thought. Keeping a certain amount of distance is good for both of them. She consoled her heart.
Sid did not want the situation to go out of control. She was a married woman for God's sake. He has no right over her and the sooner he makes his heart understand this, the better it is for both of them. He will only talk to her if it is work related. Or Else he will stay aloof. He will try. He definitely will. He had promised his brain in the morning. Sid went to the cabin and sat there browsing his mobile. But his heart was there up on the deck with her. He shook his head to throw that thought away. He will definitely go and meet Sheetal as soon as he lands in Mumbai. He needs her now. And he knew she will welcome him with open arms.
They reached the Majuli Island. Majuli island has a popular culture of mask making. One could find different and vibrant masks hanging at the shops. There is a proper workshop for the tourists to take a look at behind the scenes of the mask making. Sid informed in his documentary that these masks are made for festivals and traditional performances and takes weeks or even months to finish. He indicated that it takes a high level of focus, creativity and dedication to make such masks. Here Sid had to give too many retakes as he was not able to concentrate. He then asked for a smoke. He let a cigarette and looked her way. Their eyes met across the street. Sana looked away when she saw pain in his eyes.
Their next destination was a theatre. The theater conduct performances that really brings the culture and tradition of Assam alive through a fun visual presentation. Sid said that the performances in the theater were beautiful, colourful and fun, just like the island. Sid gave his best. And they were not many retakes.
Sid then spoke about the food on Majuli island which consists of thalis or seafood. An authentic Assamese food. Rice,vegetables fish meat, with apong a traditional rice beer. It's was a wrap. All were happy with the outcome. The crew felt it was so easy to work with Sid. Only Sana knew how difficult it was. The boys were all praises for Sid. They all climbed in the ferry to go back to the hotel. All the crew members were sitting and having a gala time. Sid was in the cabin. He felt suffocated inside, and so he came out. Sana was not there. She must be up on the deck. He thought. His brain warned him, but his heart convinced him to climb the steps up the deck. She was sitting on one of the bench, her feet up and chin resting on it. She had tears in her eyes. Hearing footsteps she looked up. Sid walked to her and stood in front of her. She straighten herself and wiped her face.
Sid: Kya hua tujhe??
She got up and went and stood on the other side of the boat. He came too and stood next to her looking at her with concern in his eyes.
Sid: Mai kuch puch raha hu na tujhse??
Sana: Siddharth jaa yaar tu yaha se.
Sid: Chala jaaunga. Pehle yeh bata tu ro kyu rahi the??
Sana: Nahi ro rahi the. Tu jaa.
Sid: Jhut mat bol.
Sana: Chod jaane de. Mai he chali jaati hu.
   She started walking and he pulled her by her arms and crushed her to him.
Sid: Sana tu chahti kya hai mujse.
Sana: Kuch nhi.
Sid: You are a married woman Sana. Kya karu mai?? Kaisi roku khud ko??
      Sana's heart hurts so much that she wanted to rip it off and throw it away. How helpless she felt at that moment. She looked at him with pleading eyes.
Sana: Kya hum dost banke nhi reh sakte??
Sid: Dost??
    Sid gave a loud laugh.
Sid: Tu aur mai dost?? Sana mai jab bhi tujhe dekhta hu na mujhe tujhe apne baho me lene ka mann karta hai. Tujhse tab tak kiss karne ko mann karta hai jab tak teri saase bhari na ho aur tu bhi mujhe apne baho me bhar na le.
    Sana closed her eyes as if inviting him, he looked at her and then it struck him hard. He pushed her away.
Sid: Tere pati ke baare me tu kabhi nhi soochti hai kya??
    Sana first didn't realize what he was saying, but then it dawn to her and she looked away.
Sid: What type of woman are you?? I'm trying to push you away and you are inviting me?? Yeh sirf mere sath he hai?? Or you do it with other men too??
    There was a crackling sound when Sana's hand hit his cheek.
Sana: I hate you.
Sid: Accha?? Abhi thodi der pehle tak to tu mere sath....
    Sana felt so ashamed of herself now. She closed her ears not wanting to hear anymore insults from him.
Sana: I wish I had not met you six years back. I wish I had not met you again.
Sid: I wish it too baby. I wish it too.
     Sid turned and left the deck, leaving a shocked and angry Sana behind. It serves her right. Her brain has warned her to stay away from him. But she was such a fool. What was she thinking. And why does she wants to be friends with him?? Doesn't she realise how dangerous it is?? She had got carried away with the soothing words of her heart. It's still time, her brain said. Get a grip and stay as far away from him as possible.
    Sid had come to the cabin and sat on the couch. He had removed a cigarette and lit it. Has she a habit of having extra marital affairs?? How many had she had in these past years?? Does her husband knows about it?? She is good at hiding things. That he very well knows about her. Her acting skills are great. How innocent she acts. And he knows all this is a lie. She is a deceitful woman. It's so unfair on her husband. Poor man. Siddharth pitied him.
    They had reached the hotel. Their flight was the next day. One destination done. Seven more left. How was she going to cope with it?? Her heart asked. By being indifferent to him. Her brain replied. And for once she listened to her brain. Sana has taken a far away seat from Sid on their way back from Jorhat to kolkata and Kolkata to Mumbai. All the interaction was through Arun. Sid too has been totally professional and arrogant. He was giving Arun a hard time. But it seems Arun knew how to handle his boss.
     Sid reached home to find Maa open the door with a loving smile. He hugged Maa and felt at peace. He was so restless since that encounter with Sana on the deck. Inviting him in, Maa made him sit on the sofa. She told Suresh to prepare tea for Sid.
Maa: Bahot thakka thakka lag raha hai.
Sid: Ha Maa bahot thak gaya hu.
Maa: Ek kaam kar, tu fresh ho jaa. Mai chai tere kamare me bhejti hu.
Sid: Thek hai.
     Sid got up was walking to his room when he suddenly stopped.
Sid: Maa mai kuch sooch raha hu.
Maa: Kya beta??
Sid: Maa kya mai yeh project khatam hone ke baad yeh sab chod du?? Hum yeh city chod kar kahi chale jaate hai.
Maa: Kya hua hai beta?? Aise kyu bol raha hai?? Tu kahi fir se wapas jaane ka to nhi sooch raha hai na??
    Sid could see fear on Maa's face. Sid realise he shouldn't have scared Maa. He came to her and took her in his arms.
Sid: Nahi Maa ab mai aapko chod kar kahi nhi jaane wala. Ab jaha bhi jaayenge hum dono jaayenge. Thek hai??
Maa: Par mujhe apna ghar chod kar kahi nhi jaana.
Sid: Ok thek hai. Fir nhi jaayenge. No big deal. Aapka jaha mann ho vaha rahenge. Maine to aise he kaha. Aap itna tension mat lo. I'm sorry Maa.
Maa: Koi baat nhi beta. Tu thak gaya hai na, isliye aise laga hoga. Jaa jaake aaraam kar.
Sid: Hmmm thek hai.
     The door was opened by her sweetheart. He had the cutest smile. Sana gathered Zoro in her arms and hugged her hard. She felt alive now that she has her son in her arms.
Sana: How are you mera baccha??
Zoro: I'm fine mama... Mai kab se wait kar raha tha.
Sana: I know baby. Maine aapko bahot miss kiya.
   Sana hugged Zoro tighter. It's only she and Zoro. Nobody is allowed inside their inner circle. Not even Sid. Never Sid.

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