I Hate Football Players 3 | 18+

Prologue: Ellie

Deep breaths. You can do this Ellie.

My finger extended and trembled while my weight shifted from one foot to the other. A breath's distance from the doorbell, I drew back.

No, I can't. Abort -

"Ellie!" The door flew open with a bang. A pair of piercingly bright blue eyes greeted me at the door of my ex-boyfriend Logan's mom's house. Given why I was here, I was eternally grateful that those eyes belonged to his mom and not Logan.

"Hi Grace," I replied as a tight smile tugged at my lips.

"Logan is... not here right now." Those ocean blue eyes that reminded me too much of Logan immediately clouded. Her smile faded slightly as her gaze dropped to what was clasped between my hands. "He left for football camp two days ago, I got back last night from UC-Davis."

"Oh." Relief immediately flooded into me, since I'd dreaded seeing him in person again.

Three months had passed by since I'd last seen Logan and no part of me deserved to even breathe the same airspace as him after what I'd done. The horrified look in his eyes when I'd removed the promise ring he'd given me for Christmas and given it back to him served as a constant mental reminder of an obvious fact.

Since I was the bitch who broke up with her dream-perfect boyfriend.

"I-I just wanted to bring this by." My voice softened as a welt of emotions crept up the back of my throat and threatened to spill over into my words. A giant pit sat in my stomach with a discomfort level secondary only to the tightness that constricted my chest.

"Oh Ellie." She opened the door and stepped aside like I was still welcomed inside their home. My feet disagreed and I stayed rooted on their front porch.

Her kindness flowed effortlessly into her voice, "Please come inside, I insist."

"I think it's best I just drop these off and go." I extended my arms to her straight out like Frankenstein, which wasn't as far off with my haggard post-work appearance as I imagined. "Please give them to Logan."

"Okay..." She eyed the items I thrust in her direction suspiciously, then focused on a soft, gray lump of personal comfort. "But you keep the sweatshirt. I know for sure that was a gift."

"All right." I pulled the shirt off the top of the pile, secretly relieved since I'd come to love my 'Lit Happens' sweatshirt. "But you have to take his jacket back."

"I am sorry things came to this." Grace's eyes deepened to a slate blue color while her fingers clasped Logan's burgundy red and gray varsity football jacket. "I'm not even going to imagine -"

"It's okay," I interrupted as a fresh batch of tears threatened my falsely stoic exterior.

"You take care of yourself, Ellie." She reached out and hugged her arms around my shoulders. "You are always welcome here, no matter what my idiot son did. And know that I'll always be an Ellie's Kitchen follower even if I burn half the recipes."

When I paused, she flashed a sheepish smile. "Okay, most of them. I do try though."

"Th-thanks," I whispered huskily, then turned and stepped quickly back to my car. My chest heaved with deep, raspy breaths as I put more and more distance between us. Just like I'd expected, as the breathing space increased, my sense of closure didn't. All I felt was a hollowness, like I'd carved out and given up some part of myself that I wasn't ready to part with.

Twelve painful weeks had passed since Logan and I had last seen each other, touched, kissed, or even spoken. The first four weeks I felt starved and checked my phone practically every thirty seconds. Like I'd requested, Logan hadn't contacted me. Although, for once, I actually wished he hadn't listened.