my diary

august 13th 2021

so life has been kinda slow. it's been three days and not that much has happened. if this was a few months ago, it would be a different story. I miss that. hanging out with Brad and them. but it's over. I have to accept that they're out of my life. well, I mostly just have to accept that HES out of my life. I miss him. I miss February when I first started talking to him more. I miss how perfect it was. how easy it was to talk to him. I know he doesn't miss me. that's what sucks the most I think. his life is so fun and cool now and even though we had something nice, his life is too crazy to even think about that. about me. I hate how I'm not one of his priorities anymore. I just hate how we aren't friends. we got along so well. anyway I have school in three days! I'm so scared but also excited!! I really really really hope I have lunch with Samantha. I'm worried about her seeing that I don't eat much though. I don't want her to think that she had to eat less because I am. but who knows, maybe I'll start eating more lol. in the morning my mom and I are gonna wake up and go shopping for bras and underwear. other than that, I just have to do laundry and figure out what I'm gonna wear for the first day of school and I'll be all ready. omg I can't wait. this year is going to be amazing. I just hope I have lunch with Samantha. omg!! so Samantha started a Wattpad and it's fantasy. it's about her and her boyfriend but it's not actual events. and guess what she names herself! Samantha! she said that that was the first name that popped in her head because she remembered that I told her that I names her Samantha on here. I ordered some clothes and they came yesterday. they're so cute!!! I'm probably gonna wear one of the t shirts with some cargo pants for the first day. maybe a jacket too. I also got a dicky collar so that's handy. me and Samantha will use it all the time. I'm so excited to share clothes with her! everyone's gonna be like "wait I thought that was Jessie's shirt why is Samantha wearing it?" ITS GONNA BE SO COOL! well it's 1 am and I have to wake up early to go shopping and I'm kinda running out of things to write about. I wish I could write nonstop but I should probably get some sleep. goodnight!