my diary

October 5th 2021

not a lot happened today but for some reason I just really wanted to write in here. yesterday I posted pictures of my friends who got suspended. I included a couple pictures of Tristan as s a kid. I got the pictures from the wall of his house. when I saw Samantha, she said her parents were really mad at me for that. I really want them to like me, but I guess I should just give up at this point. they don't even want to like me. they try to hard to find bad things about me. they tell Samantha to stop hanging out with me. they shouldn't be worried about me or Samantha's friends, they should be worrying about Tristan's friends. they are the ones getting him in trouble and smoking weed and everything. I know I used to, but I don't really smoke anymore. that didn't last very long. anyway they have my phone number my mom's number. if they were really that mad, they could've said something. but no, they just wanted to talk about it and talk about how horrible I am. they also blamed me for when Samantha got detention. they apparently told her that it's my fault and she should stop hanging out with me. I wasn't even a part of the situation at all. she has gotten in trouble ONCE, and I didn't have anything to do with it. how am I a problem? also Evan got isi. I don't really care because the only time I see him is on the bus. sometimes I see him after lunch or if I'm late to class. but what makes me sad is why he got it. so we were waiting for the bus, and he hasn't even mentioned it. I open my phone and his brother texted me "find out who evan slapped" so I asked him and he said who it was. it was this one annoying kid. then my mom came in and said "why would you tell in yourself like that? now you have isi" they talked for a little bit and she left. then I said "so why did you hit him?" and he said "you know.. because he's annoying" then I went home and my mom told me the story. he was annoying his friend (who is a girl) and then he touched her and he slapped him. I dunno that just made me sad. he did that for me before, you know? I thought I was special. I want to be special. I want him to think of me how I think of him. I still really really wanna kiss him. he sat by his sister again on the bus, so tomorrow I'm gonna ask him to sit with me because "I don't want that annoying guy to sit by me again" which is true, but I mostly wanna sit by him because.. you know. anyway I'll talk to you tomorrow hopefully!!  if it happens I'll tell you what went down okay bye!!