my diary

September 8 2021

I forgot to wear my lucky bracelet and necklace today. my day was pretty mixed. I was insecure all day about Evan. he was just extra quiet today for some reason and I convinced myself that he hates me. but I'm better now kinda. I didn't sit by him on the bus in the morning or afternoon. I just felt far from him today. there's this one girl (we'll call her Cali) who Samantha's step brother likes. so I was trying to be kinda a wingman today. I told her she should date him and she said "I would smoke with him but idk if I would date him" then we talked about how we both smoke. she gave me her snap. after school Samantha texted me and said that Cali was in the neighborhood. that made me remember to add her. we snapped for a little bit and she sent a picture of brad. she said "hey can I come over" I said "are you with Brad?" she said no. so I went and hung out with her. Samantha couldn't come out because she wanted to call her boyfriend. (oh yeah she's dating this guy in 9th grade. we like him he treats her good) after a little bit she came out and we were walking around. this guy who lives here texted me and said "I got a dap pen if you wanna come over" so we went over there. he gave Samantha some of his homework to do. when she was doing that, I took a couple hits. then we went in his house. after a while Samantha left to go call her boyfriend again. then we started hitting it like a lot. I got pretty high. it was only my second time being high. the first time was at school, the first time I smoked with those guys. then my mom FaceTimed me so I went outside (because I'm not aloud to go in his house) as I was running out there, I saw brad. he was with two girls. I waved at him and then looked away. I don't know if he waved back. I answered the phone and my mom told me to go home. then I went home. that's it! it was pretty cool but I'm just thinking about Evan. like always. anyway goodnight!