TITANS. aot

CONNECTION | yelena

[MODERN AU!] yelena | female!reader

     the snow tumbles like leaves in mid-fall, slowly and gently as it drops into the pavement and the citizens while walking to their everyday lives. the peacefulness of the winter is one of the many things you admire during the winter season, though the nipping cold was a slight disadvantage. sometimes. 

     you snuggle closer to the warmth and softness of your scarf and coat, hands stuffed in your pocket as you wait for the pedestrian signal to turn green by the side of the road.

     it was pretty crowded outside, though you're not surprised as christmas is nearing and the holiday breaks just started. it's the perfect week to buy gifts and the like to celebrate the holidays before all the perfect gifts are sold out.

     you were lucky enough to prepare your gifts for your friends and families as soon as december hit to avoid crowds and sold-out items. dallying outside was not your plan in the first place since all of your tasks are done, but reconnecting with someone who has always been important to you can surely be an excuse.

     the light soon turned green and you crossed the road with the other pedestrians, checking your time as you started to jog, careful of the slippery ground. you didn't even notice you were already five minutes late, and the woman you were meeting with had been waiting for more than ten.

     it's embarrassing to keep someone waiting.

     you soon reached the coffee shop you both agreed to, eyes searching through the window for any familiar face before stepping inside.

     cocoa beans and vanilla immediately wafted through your nostrils, followed by the comforting warmth of the building. you shuddered, relaxing in the sudden heat as you remove your hands from your coat. looking around, you immediately spotted the familiar woman sitting by the corner of the shop. it's not hard to look for her—her height can easily grab anyone's attention, including yours, even if she's trying to hide.

     you licked your lips, cringing at how dry and cracked it feels. you didn't have time to put on chapstick as she caught your wandering eyes and waved you over with a charming smile on her face. smiling nervously, you waved back before making your way towards the table. 

     the second her beautiful eyes caught yours, everything just dawned on you. about what's happening, about who you're meeting with, and how long it has been since you've seen each other. 

     it's too late to run back now. not when she's in front of you as she pulled out a chair for you, flashing you the same damned smile that caused your heart to flutter and butterflies to act all frenzy in your stomach. until now. 

     gulping your saliva down, you took her invitation to sit down in front of her, arms crossed together on your lap as you look everywhere but the blonde. the thought of just sitting there without talking to each other or acknowledging one's presence would be great, though you knew better to dream. there's no way she'd let that happen, not when she's the one who personally asked you to meet her.

     "how have you been, y/n?" her voice. how you missed it.

     warm that it melts away all of your troubles and thoughts within a second, but cool enough that it still sends that familiar shivers throughout your body.

     "i've been... good," you answered quietly, "how about you, yelena?"

     yelena smiled, "how about we talk about our lives over hot chocolate? i invited you here for a reason."

     you watch as she stands up, heading to the counter to place both of your orders. you didn't even get to tell her what you want or give her your money—she never allowed you to pay for your food before, so it's clearly not going to change until now. 

     yelena knows you long enough to know what kind of drinks and food you always order when it's winter. it's no longer a surprise that she came back with a cup of hot chocolate filled with marshmallows and a fresh cinnamon roll out of the oven, the same things you always get when it's available.

     you grabbed the mug, sighing in content as it warmed your trembling fingers before taking a sip. "mm, this one is delicious, thank you again." you said, chewing on some of the marshmallows.

     "i quit my job," yelena started as she takes her hot tea, "decided to just live in the moment. had enough money, though, don't worry."

     you smiled at her update, nodding. "that's so great, yelena. i'm proud of you. as long as you're happy."

     she always expressed how much she hates working. that she doesn't want to work anymore, not because she's lazy but she's tired. tired of living up to people's standards to find their definition of success. she never did quit though, during the whole eight months you two were together. money was needed and she won't have the motivation to live if she's not doing anything or busying herself.

     if anything, hearing her that she finally quit her job and lived her life to the fullest when she couldn't before brought you a spark of joy. you're proud of her.

     if you knew she'd reach this happiness and freedom without you, maybe you would've let her go early.

     "what about you?" the woman questioned, "surely you've done a lot these days."

     "just... you know," you answered bashfully as you look down on your lap, "i haven't done much since we broke up."

     all you've said is the truth. you and yelena broke up mutually months ago, seeing as both of you were more focused on different things than your relationship.

     it hurt, it still does, but the choice to do so was important because both of you would reach nothing at all if it continues. you've spent most of your nights wondering what would've happened if you both tried to make it work or if you both started again. if you both tried to fix it.

     maybe then you wouldn't be sitting here in front of her awkwardly, acting like you two are on your first date. bashful and awkward high school students who don't know how to handle their feelings and emotions.

     maybe then you'd be spending your holidays with her, cuddling and making out by the fireplace, not reconnecting with her again.

     "it's been hard, you know," you whispered while playing with your fingers, "when you left, i mean."

     the tip of your ears felt hot as you looked down at the cup of hot chocolate in your hands. "i'm not going to lie, i didn't move on." you said, louder than before. "i never had the thought. maybe if we'd been separated for a long time, i would. but..."

     "it's okay." yelena said, picking up her tea. "i didn't too."

     relief washed over you like a wave, followed by giddiness as you brought your cup to your lips to hide the stupid smile that made its way to your lips.

     you tried to say the right words, but all you could utter out was a dumb "oh".

     "i invited you out here because i wanted to see if we could still work us out." yelena continued, confident and clear about what she wants. "i never stopped loving you, y/n."

     reaching over the table, she took your hand in hers. the feeling was foreign, yet at the same time, it was the taste of home.

     you squeezed her hand, intertwining your fingers together. "so, how about it?" she asked, soft and charming. "should we start again before christmas?"

a/n: happy holidays everyone!!! god i missed you all sm <33 i know this isn't much but i've been experiencing burnout lately lol nonetheless, i hope you all enjoy this. i'll try to be back as soon as possible. have a good new year in advance, ily all!