Something about Rain

I don't... hate you

It's hard to see them together, but it was harder to keep up with something that feels so wrong.

"If you exhale your breath harder, you probably could cause a tornado." Kath sat beside you, offering you some lollipops.

"Sorry.."

"What's with you and this apologizing shit?

You got unlimited of those words? My ears are seriously hurt every time you say sorry."You're sad, sorry. You hurt, sorry. You are the one who had a bad day, sorry. Sorry, sorry, sorry, for everything, "Try to say sorry less from now on."

"Okay.."

"How are you feeling?" You were quiet. Just like your usual self.

"Me? Better.." Of course you will be constantly thinking about Jimin. Imagine the time you had with him. There is nothing you could do about it anyway, "It's for the best.."Jimin also acts the same. As if it was nothing.He was behaving like you were not around.What did you expect?

"I thought he would immediately break up with Yuuna. But he didn't." "What if they do.. Will you accept him again?"

"I don't know... Probably.." Because you are stupid and it was hard to unlove him."I know you will." She was betting with herself, "Let's go back to the dorm. Don't wander alone by yourself around this time, ok?" You were easily distracted these days.

You could end up hurting yourself. She didn't want to be responsible for that. You nodded and followed her back to the dorm.

"Look who is here." Kath patted his back. There was no one else as tall as him around, "Looking for me, mate?" Of course she knew Namjoon was looking for you. She was just teasing him.

"Yes, actually I need the report you were supposed to make last week. Have you done it yet?"

You lowered your head, avoiding his gaze. You had embarrassed yourself enough.

"No, I'm busy. You do it for me." She shrugged.

"Can you be responsible?" Namjoon frowned.She was always getting on his nerves. He felt his position was nothing in front of this girl. She just never listens!

"Then you have to wait.. let's go inside Y/n."

"Oh, okay.." You just left him after storming that day. Quite sure he must be disgusted by you now. He was good both as upperclassmen and friend. He will meet someone..You felt a small tug on your shirt. Slowly looking at his hand and up to his face.

"Let's talk..." He cleared his throat.

"You are looking for her!" Kath rolled her eyes.She knew it! He would never look for her, giving her a task is the same as doing it himself. He wouldn't come here to ask for it!

"Follow me.." Lacing his fingers with yours, you were surprised with his action.

"J.. joon.."

"It won't take long."Namjoon brought you to the bench near the library. You looked around, there is no one here around this hour. The other student must be in their dorm already.

"I don't hate you." He started.

"Huh?" He was looking down at you, with a serious and firm face.

"I don't hate you." He repeated, "I think I will, but I don't.." He thought of it many, many times. He ridiculed himself for being so naive. He was never really like someone before. It surprised him too that he was willing to accept it. Thinking about you made his heart beat faster, your small smile and gentle features. Everything about you is beautiful. And he just could not hate you. He was so in love with you so deep that he could turn blind to whatever you had in the past. He did not mind if you belonged to someone else once. It was better than not being able to be with you.

"You should be.." You said softly.

"You ended it with him. You know it was wrong too, so you quit."

"How do you know?" You didn't tell him that far

"I just know.." He got a whisper.

"Joon, its-" He is about to make terrible choices, you couldn't let him.

"Will you listen to me first?" 

"I don't ask you to agree to dating me immediately. But could you give me a chance? Don't shut yourself from me. I will do my best to make you fall in love with me.." "At the time.. if you still don't like me, I'll give up.." He won't give up. He didn't know what giving up was.

"..." You just looked at your shoes, he was very genuine towards you, and you were a coward.

"Let's go back, it's getting late.." Namjoon took your hand again, his grip was strong and secure. 

He walked you back to the dorm.

His face was flushing after the little speech, lucky he was walking in front of you or else that will be embarrassing for you to see him.

"Good night.." He is reluctant to let go of your hand. It is weird so tiny and soft compared to his own. Your white slender fingers, cute nails. He found it adorable. Not a common word he usually used in his daily life. He wished he could take a picture.

"Good night." You replied, waiting for him to let go of your hand.

"I'll pick you up to have lunch tomorrow." As he usually did.

"Okay.." He stared down at you, how he could take his eyes off you.

"I really should get going now.." Before you think of him as a shameless boy who refused to let go of your hand. He was just fighting back the urge to kiss you and keep it pure for now. You watched his back getting further and further.

You know you can't accept him, it was just taking advantage of his good intentions. He deserves someone better. Until he realizes it then, maybe.. you will rely on him a little

by bangtanboyspersona

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