Tangent | Soukoku; AU [✔]

55 ➳ white noise // n.c

it's been two days ever since the semifinals, and ever since the last time i've heard from xyren. i have found myself staring in the air for lengthy periods of time while the last words of the woman rings in my ear from time to time.

"i'm sorry that you have to take everyone's beating so much... but i'm sorry too, i think you deserve it sometimes."

i have disappointed her big time during the past few games that had passed, didn't i? i did my best to try gathering feedback from my other teammates regarding my performance in the game, but all i get were vague answers or none at all.

"you're doing fine, but you should stop giving hayakawa such a hard time." was tachihara's words to me.

"i don't know, chuuya. you are tanking the coach's words all the time lately aren't you?" and these were kajii's response to my question.

of course, akutagawa just gives me the cold shoulder and shrugs me off, despite my best efforts to squeeze answers from him. and i won't dare ask the coach too - i already get lectured so much in meetings, what more if i talk to him one-on-one.

the team agreed to resume meetings again today, after giving everyone a break for a day to reset their mental. almost everyone seems refreshed now except for myself and of course, i'm never really sure with xyren's feelings anyway.

coach began the meeting by proposing a team building activity two days before the finals, saying that this was something that the rest of the world does occasionally before grand tournaments. it's believed to help strengthen the team's bond together and gets their mind refreshed away from just the usual gaming.

from that point on, my soul started drifting apart from the meeting - everything started to sound like white noise, while only picking up important queues from coach mori such as watching the games for the past days, my name, and xyren's nam- wait what? why is that a queue word.

"while xyren's supporting skills had worked and has brought us all the way to finals," coach mori paused the video shown in the projector, putting down his marker before proceeding. "what is everyone's opinion on: what if chuuya and xyren swap roles for the finals?"

it feels like something snapped in my brain. you already said the cue word, coach: it worked.

before anyone could speak, i stood up to protest the proposal, but not completely in denial of the idea. "we don't have to, coach! ren and i are doing fine!"

"yes i know, but-" the coach attempted to give a rebuttal to my testament, but someone immediately spoke out their thoughts as well; as fast as my reaction time to express my refusal.

"you don't have to, coach," it was xyren. it was nice to hear her speak again after some absence from it. "it's best that we do not for now. you can just swap us when you deem it necessary during the finals."

"may i get a reason why, hayakawa?"

the room was filled with white noise for a brief moment before xyren sighed. her red eyes stared directly at me again that sent down countless shivers down the base of my spine.

"you'd rather have a tired support than a tilted adc."

i scratched the back of my head from the remark; i wanted to protect my pride from this woman. it seems to me that she has been trying to attack it for the weeks that had passed, and i haven't even gotten over from the first few instances, let alone the recent ones.

while i acknowledge most of it already as xyren had attempted to be frank to me about it, i wonder what this is all about? if dazai is behind all of this, i swear that despite my high hopes for the woman, her biggest mistake on her part is being acquainted with that suicidal freak.