'where we are now' remus lupin & regulus black

Daylight

"Telling myself I won't go there
Oh, but I know that I won't care
Tryna wash away all the blood I've spilt
This lust is a burden that we both share
Two sinners can't atone from a lone prayer
Souls tied, intertwined by our pride and guilt"
_____________________

It's been about thirty minutes since I arrived at the hospital. The waiting room smells of cleaning supplies, disinfectants and chemicals that attacked my senses the minute I walked in. It's eerily quiet, save for the clicks and clacks of the receptionist's long finger nails against her keyboard.

The room is petite, smaller than Dumbledore's office and I can hear muffled voices looming around the corner. My hands shake as I lift the cup of the worst coffee I've ever tasted to my lips. Four in the morning on a Monday night, the brain fog is real.

Even though it's quiet, despair roams the room. Exhaled from the breath of worriers like me. I silently beg for a small mercy.

And, it is granted.

The double doors in the waiting room fly open, and Amos rushes out with his eyes darting around the room frantically. Finally, his eyes lock on mine. I stand up as he rushes towards me for a hug.

My arms wrap around the tall boy and I breathe in peaches and fresh cut grass. "Thank you for coming," he breathes.

Oh, I miss you.

Oh, I miss Iris.

Oh, I miss us.

"How is she?" I ask after my heart is satisfied by the length of our hug. We pull back, arms still entwined.

Amos sighs in disbelief as a smile finds his way across his face. "Yeah, she's great. Tired as all hell, but what else can you expect?" His smile grows a bit bigger, "He's really here, Cordelia."

Cedric.

My heart skips with excitement. After all the loss and death I've been surrounded by, something, someone new was due to come into my life. I fully untangle ourselves, "Can I—I mean would it be okay if I-"

Amos chuckles, "Shut up, Delia. You don't have to ask to see your God son."

My face goes blank. "My what?"

Suddenly he looks sheepish. "I mean if you accept it, of course. It's just that if something were ever to happen to me or Ashlynn...I can't think of anyone else I would want to raise my boy."

"Me?"

"Yes, you. Do you accept it or not?"

I smile, "Of course! Now take me to see my son,"

Amos laughs loud, a sound I didn't know I'd forgotten until now. "Don't say that in front of Ashlynn," he says as he leads me to the room.

I hope I never forget anything again.

☽☽☽

"Good afternoon," I say, taking a seat across from Sirius and Remus. I'm seated next to Marlene.

There will be an ache in my chest if I think too hard about them being next to each other. So I don't.

I haven't eaten with the Gryffindors in as long as I can remember, and looking around the table makes me miss it. Lily is so enthralled in her conversation with Dorcas that she doesn't even realize I've sat down; Peter and James chuckle and banter over which Slytherin is the biggest snake; Frank and Alice giggle and make goo-goo eyes. The collective, comforting energy only shared between friends is present and strong.