Dear diary,
I finished placement quite early it was the most pointless day. Wish I just stayed home. Didn't feel good today felt quite nauseous but I powered through and I have a really bad headache
I'm sat opposite boots in the hospital Iehab works, I got myself a meal deal for tomorrow although I'm drinking the drink lol, it's the innocent drink I like.
I have my naproxen in my bag and with the way my head is killing right now, I think I might have to take it.
Iehab is a little worried about me so she wanted to meet with me, so I said okay. I told her not to be worried though. I haven't even told her much but she said she wants to see me and stuff.
Went home, had a shower etc and now I'm here. I
Su from work texted me today and she was so sweet
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Okay so I'm home now, I wrote that when I was waiting for iehab. I got there at like 5pm so I only had to wait 15 mins and I got myself a meal deal for placement tomorrow too.
The first thing she said was "do you have your charger on you?" Of course I do. I always bring my charger, even if my phone has 100%, my friends will use it.
We both wanted Popeyes, a new one has opened near bay so we got there and it was so busy cos it's just opened, and her two sisters and aunt were there so we sat with them. Food was banging I'm surprised I finished it all.
I have a habit of needing to eat something sweet after food so we went to Lidl and I got myself a chocolate bar lol. I've started my "health kick" today. I just wanna be active. Wanna start going gym, or for walks and runs.
We then went to Starbucks. I didn't get anything which is a surprise but I was really full but she got her mocha and we sat and spoke. We weren't as hyper we were in a chilled mood but we still laughed and stuff. We kinda had more serious conversations today.
She was asking me about hospital and stuff. She said she'd go with me but I told her straight up I might wanna go alone. I appreciate her wanting to come with me but I just don't know. I told her it might not even be anything, it's probably largely just stress, I said I'm probably overthinking it loads and she said it's better to overthink something like this than to not take it seriously. Cos I told her I wish I'd never went to the GP for it. I told her if it's cancer, I'd rather not know and just live my life unknowingly. But she said I did the right thing.
She asked me about my other sister and the baby and obviously I was sad. I was like I can't go baby shopping and stuff. I was in a bit of a sad mood today I can't lie. I didn't feel like my usual self. And I also felt really nauseous today and had a headache all day, my nose bled as I was driving, but it was minor and thankfully my vision was fine.
I said it all could just be really bad migraines cos a lot of my symptoms point to that but I really wish I didn't have a hospital appt and didn't go to the GP for it and would just live my life and ignored it.
She said she knew someone that was fine and then one day she randomly started getting symptoms like something happened overnight and she said stress is a major factor. I was like yeah :/
We said a lot more, talked about her and spicy cinema date lol. I was a little surprised when she said what happened between them in the cinema but apparently not many people were there but then again I can't talk😂 I like how open we are with each other. I also like a little cheeky thing going on in the cinema it's nice or like places where you shouldn't really, but it's fun like it gives it an element of fun but anyways
I miss his cuddles right now tho and his forehead and nose kisses
Speaking of, I have felt a little spicy the last few days and I think it's also cos of how stressed I've been.
Don't even get me started with placement. That's the biggest toss up right now.
Also, I had girl talk with ays today and I fully straight up told her me and A are together cos the other day I said it I don't think she entirely believed me , she took it surprisingly well. Didn't turn into a bad conversation and I appreciate what she said.
I still don't know if I wanna do PA. I don't know how I feel about it. Urgh. I don't know. I wanna get transferred to a Welsh uni to stay in wales for placement but that's either Swansea - which I got rejected from, or Bangor - which accepted me but it's also far. But they might do Welsh hospitals for placement but then GP placement will be difficult cos I love my gp placement.
I have a few more updates about my sisters baby. But I can't be bothered to get into it right now. I just wanna relax.
Omg that reminds me A's text this morning was so sweet. I was half asleep when I read it but I smiled when I read it.
I am for some reason feeling a little spicy again tonight but I am gonna try to ignore it lol. I did finish the Tyson fury Netflix show and I actually enjoyed it.
I also wanted to watch the film tenet by Christopher Nolan (the director of Oppenheimer and interstellar) and I was gonna see if I could buy it on Amazon prime, and I open Netflix and you know what film is trending? Tenet. I was like bloody hell what are the chances 😨 I wanna watch that. Christopher Nolan never disappoints.
I listened to Einaudi today and the thought of seeing him in October makes me so excited
I also wanna buy some nice dresses for Dubai. Want some outfits. Don't think I'll be wearing jeans in dubais heat, even in November. 😥
It's autumn now, I think? August is basically over. So let my fave season commence. Can't wait for pumpkin spice lattes and horror films and gingerbread and egg nog lattes and brown themed outfits and grey and coats and the vibe and mood and everything! Candles and blankets and jumpers. Urgh my fave! It reminds me of twilight 😂
I need to put my clothes away but I cba so I might do it tomorrow. Or I might just do it now before bed. I need to wake up extra early for placement now cos I find far away streets to park on so I don't have to pay but have to walk like 20 mins to get there fml. I HATE HOSPITAL PLACEMENT SO MUCH.
I cannot believe I'm in my final year of uni and I'm thinking of dropping out or taking a break. It doesn't feel real
I feel like idk a thing
I'm gonna take his Mac with me tomorrow so I can do a bit of revision. We aren't actually actively learning anything from uni as we are in placement for ten weeks now, but I wanna review stuff. Especially how to interpret ECGs , I don't know how to do that and they pick on you to interpret things and it's awkward when you don't know. I'll only do like thirty mins but that means I'll have some free time in the evening so I could go gym or see friends.
Also this jumper I wanted on asos is out of stock 😭😭
Good night diaryyyy
22:05 pm
