Dear diary
It's now 7am on Saturday 11th November.
I just went for a walk/run in this freezing cold weather, but I really needed it. (It's 4 degrees)
It was spontaneous but I can't tell you how I've been feeling lately and just yeah.
I've wrote A LOT, and even uploaded one but deleted it. I just don't want to write about yesterday and the day before. Just , don't even wanna think about anything.
I saw both the girls and A in work yesterday. My Uber driver was like you're such a good friend seeing them in work lol. I know Iehab is a little down lately so I wanted to make sure she's okay. Omg my one Uber driver was like I could talk to you forever you're a "top woman" lol. He even said he can tell I'm a peoples person lol.
What I want for Christmas? (My fave time of the year)
1) With all my heart , to not have cancer even tho it's confirmed.
2) I want to be happy and to love unconditionally and be loved unconditionally from those around me. Like to not have someone think "I won't do this for her cos she didn't do that for me" cos I don't think I'm like that. Basically I want genuine people in my life.
3) A car. I really, really, need and want a car. Please. lol
4) fluffy Christmas socks.
I'm still packing believe it or not lol. Almost done. I've got most of my stuff in my suitcase.
Im wearing his hoodie and it still smells of him a little.
it'll be about 6 days, we get there Sunday morning and leave on Saturday. Dubai is somewhere I've always wanted to go, so I need to make the most of it and consider myself blessed to be able to go. I need to put my thoughts away, everything I wanna talk about, away for the time being, and focus on being happy, focus on myself, idc about other peoples actions anymore.
I bought my sister chocolate to give her cos she said she isn't a fan of Arab chocolate, (speaking of Arab desserts, I left my kanafa in his car it was so tasty)
The only thing I need to remember is to email uni telling them I'm ill. And then that's it. Brain will not be on UK mode. Isn't it sad that I'm looking forward to actually escape my life for 6 days?
It's important to me to leave on good terms with everyone cos you never know what will happen. The plane could crash for all I know.
I'm leaving on good terms with everyone apart from my dad which we shall see how that goes, and H but she hasn't messaged me at all. I'd be surprised if she texts a safe flight, she probably won't remember. Oh well. Idk what's gotten into her lately. Like I said, I don't wanna let other peoples actions bother me anymore, it's a reflection of them, not me.
InshAllah it's a safe flight, and a safe journey and a happy holiday. I'm looking forward to some time to myself. And I actually like airplane food lol. Airport vibes. (I love take off but landing and turbulence scare me a little if it's not smooth lol). Looks like Canada is off due to uni so I'm happy Dubai is something we are doing.
Smell ya later diary,
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7:24am
My mum wants me to drive lol
