inadequate ☠ afi + lrh • mgc/cth (boyxboy)

c.t.h

June 16 2014, 1:03 a.m

a clap from the girl beside me made me laugh, but definitely didn't take away the burning sensation from my throat though.

"damn, Asian boy. eight shots in a row without any pauses. I must say incredible," she smiled and I rolled my eyes giving a small playful bow.

"so, you gonna try?"

she shook her head, "no I know how i'll act and I really don't want to embarrass myself in this state," she said making me shrug and grab my pack of cigs.

"wanna step outside with me?"

she nodded her head as we made our way through people and finally got to the doors, and walked into the alley way.

after lighting one up, I took a big huff and passed it over to the girl whose name I still hadn't known.

"what's your name," I questioned, blinking rapidly trying to get my vision to unblur.

"rosie," she breathed out. "what's yours?"

"calum."

she smiled and nodded her head and passed my cig back to me. I sighed, causing her to look in my direction.

"wanna know something?" she asked and I nodded my head.

"this was my first time at a bar," she shrugged and I have her a questionable look.

"really?" and she nodded her head.

"wanna tell me another secret?" I asked smiling as she chuckled and shrugged.

"how about we exchange secrets."

my palm started to sweat and I had the sudden urge to go throw up, but instead I nodded my head and stayed.

"okay guess i'll start; i'm a virgin, clearly," she said, muttering the last part as I chuckled.

"i'm a virgin too," I said, admitting mine as well as she blushed.

"really?" and I nodded my head.

this exchanging secrets went on for a half an hour, until they actually started getting personal. we were sitting in the alley way, on the corner of a curb.

"i use to be skinny," she said and I just stared at her, not knowing what to say. good thing she kept on talking.

"uhm, it was 2013, i use to have so many friends, and I'd always hang out with them. guess you could say I was popular. and I was actually happy with the way I look. I thought I was gorgeous," she chuckled making me give her a weak smile.

"and boys would always try hitting on me, but it wasn't nothing special. I was use to it and didn't think anything of it. but when I went to my friends house, we all got drunk and there was this guy. his name was Daniel, and he continued to touch me, even after I told him to stop."

I shook my head, "Rosie its okay. you don't have to tell me this," I said feeling sick to my stomach but she just continued on.

"i cried for my friends, but they were passed out because they were so drunk. and he held me down and told me to shut my mouth," she said tears rolling down her cheeks, "so I did."

she tried her best to stop crying and she kept wiping her tears so none was visible, but I could hear her voice cracking and the way she sounded so broken.

I leaned in, rubbing her back, trying my best to comfort her. never had I known anyone that was raped. and especially someone my age so I wasn't exactly sure how to feel. but I felt bad.

"so I thought maybe if I was fat no one would look at me the way I was before. what could someone possibly want with a fat girl? look i'm ugly," she said and I had to force myself not to glare at her and go off.

I stood up, recieving a confused look from her.

"listen to me," I said, "fat and ugly are not synonyms. and that's a lot coming from a guy who starves himself, and think of himself poorly. so don't you dare call yourself ugly. yeah, maybe you did gain weight, but that doesn't mean you're ugly. you were gorgeous before, and you're gorgeous now," I said feeling anger in me, and relaxing after I told her that no matter what she weighed, she was beautiful. and it was true. she is.

but she didn't think me. all that escaped her lips were, "what?"

"I said you're still gorgeous. it doesn't matter what you weigh," I said and she shook her head standing up.

"no," she shook her head, "you starve yourself?"

my facial expression dropped, and I couldn't believe what I said, nor did I know I had even told her. I went to go speak, but i couldn't. nothing would come out my mouth. but then everything hit me all at once and this girl, who I only had known for a couple of hours, now was the first to know my secret.

and then I lost it. tears were falling down my face, and I couldn't stop crying. I was crying so badly, hiccups were coming from my mouth, and my nose was running. my stomach hurt the most though.

"come here," she said as we sat against the brick wall, and she held me.

it hasn't been long since the last time I cried though. I normally have mental break downs when i'm alone, so the only difference is that someone is actually holding me this time.

once I finally had my breakdown, I pulled away from Rosie, wiping my eyes and apologizing for puttin her in this position.

she shrugged her shoulders and smiled, "I guess we're both a little fucked up, huh?"

I smiled and nodded my head, "welcome to being a misfit, ms. rosie," I smiled and she giggled and I grabbed her hand.

"a club isn't any fun. how about we go to a park or something?"

a smirk appeared on her lips, "actually, I might have something better than just a park," she smiled and I returned it giving her a confused look and chuckled as she just shook her head.

"cmon on," and with that she tugged me along.

okAy I ship CALIE who else does??!! BUT THEYRE SO CUTE I JUST UGHHH OKAY OKAY so calum finally admitted what was wrong with him to somebody, and nobody was expecting that about rosie, huh? I have my twist ;-)

and I also wanted to say that I know I talked about some touchy things and it might have looked like I was talking bad about bigger people and I AM CLEARY NOT IT IS JUST WHAT ROSIE THINKS ABOUT HERSELF SO DONT BE CRITIZING. no way would I ever fat shame, unless it's my self. i'm a fatty myself and I don't really care bc food so yeah, i'm not judging.