inadequate ☠ afi + lrh • mgc/cth (boyxboy)

a.f.i

June 22, 2014, 1:32 p.m

I was upstairs, in my bedroom alone, listening to good Charlotte. it was one of Luke's favorite bands.

speaking of luke, he hasn't answered any of my text. he even read the first one, but the last four he's been ignoring, which I don't know why. I hadn't done anything for him to ignore me.

I knew he was advoiding me when he looked straight at me at the hospital the other day with calum, but said nothing.

it made me feel even worse than I already was feeling. and seeing him all buddy-buddy with Niall wasn't helping either. I mean, he's my best friend. not nialls. I can get upset over this. I have the right too anyways. after all, h is my best friend. you know, it's whatever. he'll come around. after all, we're best friends. he won't stay mad at me.

maybe it's because of what I said a few days back when Brittany dumped me. oh brittany. she literally broke my heart. okay, not literally, but still. she hurt me. I still love her. I might always will.

but it won't change anything.

maybe I should go over to Luke's. maybe I should just straight up ask him why he's been ignoring me. after all, he can't get away from me if I'm there.

I got up from bed, throwing on a plain white tee shirt, and some black skinny jeans before getting my shoes on and walking outside. it was sprinkling, and mom was at work so I'd have to walk.

I groaned, but pulled on my black hoodie before I began running down the street, heading to Luke's house. his house was only a ten minute run away, so it wasn't that bad.

once I got on his block I began to walk, so I could catch my breath. I soon got to his house, and walked up o the porch. his moms car was gone, and so was his dad's, so I wasn't for sure if he was home or not.

but once I heard to loud laughs, probably from the living room, I knew he was there. I knocked on the door twice, waiting for him to answer.

when the door opened, h was facing the other way laughing, then turned to me, and he slowly stopped smiling and I saw Niall in the background.

"are you busy?" I questioned feeling bad, seeing that he wasn't expecting to see me.

"oh, uh yeah kind of," he said scratching the back of his neck, not making any eye contact with me.

"oh..." I said. i expecting him to say that. honestly I expected him to still invite me in, but I guess not. "yeah, sorry," I said more stern and shook my head, turning around to go walk off his porch.

"wait, Ashton," he said and I glanced back at him as he still refused to look me in the eyes, which I still do know why.

"do you need a ride home or something?"

my hopes got up, and I came to realization. he didn't want me there. and he made that clear by asking if I needed a ride. I shook my head, furrowing my brow.

"you alright?"

I chuckled, coldly, "oh, for a second there, I thought you almost cared."

but this time, his eyes met mine, and he gave me a sad look, and I shook my head feeling empty. my best friend just completely blew me off.

I didn't waste time to walk off, and began running down the street. and I didn't stop till I got to my house, and went straight to my room, ignoring my brothers calls and locked the door.

I started crying, feeling completely weak and not sure why I was crying. he didn't even say anything bad. he was just busy with his other friend. so why was I crying?