inadequate ☠ afi + lrh • mgc/cth (boyxboy)

c.t.h

June 21, 2014, 10:12 p.m

I was laying in bed. I had a package of sliced apples beside of me, and I was snacking on them. it made me feel weird to actually eat without throwing up, or feeling the need to throw it away.

but I need to get better. Rosie was still here and she seemed to make everything better.

"so before I go, make me a promise," he said and I nodded.

"never do this again. and if you ever feel the need you'll call me," she said holding her pinky out and I linked mine with hers and kissed my hand and she kisse hers and I smiled.

"we'll do it the healthy way. we'll eat healthy, and go exercising," she smiled and I nodded.

I was just happy my friends were here for me. I was really scare of what everyone was going to say and think of me. it literally broke me when michael first came in.

he hasn't said anything else to me. he's just sat in here, watching tv with me, and often brings me a drink or something.

Rosie left, and my parents came in, checking on me again. my sister seemed very close. I knew she felt like part of this was her fault, but it's no ones but mine.

my attention turned towards the doorway seeing michael there and smiled. my parents gave me a hug before them and my sister left, leaving michael.

"hey," I said lowly glancing down.

he took a seat on the bed beside of me, and stayed quite for a couple seconds before deciding to speak.
"i'm sorry about earlier..."

I nodded my head playing with my fingers, feeling nervous for some reason. I hated when michael was mad with me.

"look calum, I know I kind of blew up and made you cry, i'm really sorry. okay? it's just that I care so much about you, and I just can't believe I didn't know. how could I have not known? i'm your best friend and I could have helped you and made sure none of this happened.

"no mikey, it's not your fault. it's never been your fault. you're the best friend I could ever imagine to have," I said and he frowned.

"calum.." he said with tears in his eyes, "you could have died in my arms," he said shaking his head, "if you would have died on me, I coul never forgive myself for not knowing."

I shook my head grabbing his hand and pulling him into a hug. michael was definitely the most sensitive out of the boys and I. he was just a cuddly, clingy, softy. he wasn't afraid to show his feelings.

"i'm sorry. I won't do it again," I cried holding him and he sniffled nodding.

"I love you. i'm sorry cal," he said.

"i love you too, michael."