Just the two of us (book 3)

Chapter 7 Talking

Ken didn't come home last night and I sat up most of the night crying. I don't know if I've lost him but I think I have, because he's never left me like that before. I've tried calling him and texting him but he doesn't reply.

I wake up by the sound of the door cracking open into the bedroom and I see Ken standing there. I look over at the clock and it's 6:09AM.
"Where have you been?" I immediately ask him.
"Driving around." He says as walks over and sit on the bed.
"I was worried." I say.
"Sorry.. I shouldn't have left like that but this is a totally messed up situation." He sighs.
"I know."
"What else haven't you told me?" He asks.
"I swear, there's nothing more." I promise.
"How should I be able to trust you when you've lied to me for the past two years?" He asks.
"I'm sorry.. I just couldn't tell you Ken. I was trying to put my past behind me and so it was easier to pretend that he wasn't her father." I say.
"You never thought he would find out?" He frowns.
"Honestly.. No." I say. "I didn't have any contact with him."
"How the fuck did he find out anyways?" He asks.
"Remember the day we went to McDonald's with Amy when you were hungover?" I ask.
"Yes."
"He was there." I say. "He sat a couple of seats from us and when you went to the toilet, he started talking to me. I lied to him and told him you were the father but Lucas messed up big time, he told Marshall that we had only been together for two years so I guess Marshall figured it out then."
"This is gonna ruin everything Amelia." He sighs.
"Is it gonna ruin us?" I ask afraid of his answer.
"It depends if you still have a weakness for him." He says.
"I don't have a weakness for him." I lie. I've become much stronger so I would never cheat on Ken, but I still love Marshall and I always will.
"So you didn't feel anything when you saw him yesterday?" He asks.
"I felt anger because he walks into my life, when I don't even want him in my life." I tell him.
"I wanna be there next time he sees Amy, I want to make sure that he knows where his place is and that your and Amy are my family." Ken now says which makes me very very happy, because that means that he wants to stay.
"I understand." I say.
"But no more lies Amelia, if I ever catch you in another lie then I will leave you, you know that I don't tolerate lies." He warns me. I actually thought he would leave me because of this, because loyalty is very important to him.
"I know." I say.
"Good." He says and lays down next to me. "There's 30 min till we have to get up."
"Have you even slept?" I ask.
"A little in the car but else no."
"Why don't you get some sleep then? I'll wake up Amy then." I suggest.
"No I can't sleep.. This whole situation.. Amelia.. It's.."
"Fucked up." I cut him off. "I know."
"I imagined Amy growing up seeing me as a father and.."
"She still will." I cut him off.
"I'm not so sure.. Her father is Eminem for Christ sake Amelia." He sighs.
"But you are there. He lives in Detroit.. Like come on.. How often is he really gonna be there?"  I say.
"What if he wants shared custody?" Ken asks the question I even haven't given a thought.
"I'm not going down without a fight." I say and I really mean it. I refuse to let him walk into our life and make demands! It's my daughter, it's Ken's daughter and he's only involved by blood, nothing else.
"Amelia, he's gonna win this battle no matter what." He sighs.
"Trust me, he won't." I say. "I know him and he can threaten me with lawyers all that he wants, but he forgets how much shit I have on him as well." Ken becomes silence and he just looks at me for a few minutes.
"I love you and Amy so much and I don't wanna lose you." He says.
"You're not gonna lose us." I assure him.
"Did Amy like him?" He asks and I already know the answer is gonna hurt.
"She did." I say and he sighs deeply. "But she loves you Ken." I say.
"I know." He says. "Did you and Marshall ever talk about kids?"
"Never." I say. Me and Marshall never talked about future stuff like that, mostly because he was very fine with his girls.
"The two of you have something special." He says.
"Had." I correct him.
"You still had something with him that you can't have with anybody else." He says.
"Yes but you know.. I came to Detroit when I was 16, I was very broken and Marshall helped me a lot. He helped me a lot with what I was going through with James, even though he didn't know at the time." I explain. "But the two of us also has something very special, something I can't get with anybody else."
"How come?"
"Because you took me and Amy into your life, you took Amy into your heart as she was your own. That's a real man and not many men had done that." I say.
"You always know what to say baby." He says smiling and kisses me. I actually didn't think I was gonna feel those lips again so this kiss is really really nice.
"I love you." I say and snuggle into his chest.
"I love you too." He says and there's a moment of silence. "Have you talked to Lucas since all this went down?"
"No." I say. I blame Lucas a little for all this mess and I know I'm gonna say something not that nice to him. I haven't even told Tasha about this because I've been too filled up thinking about this situation.
"You should." He says.
"No because I'm not gonna be that nice." I say.
"This isn't Lucas' fault. He didn't know what you had told Marshall."
"Still he's a fucking idiot."
"You can't blame him for this. You can really only blame yourself." He says. Not him too.. I move away from getting a little angry.
"I did what was best for Amy." I frown.
"But still it was your lie, you can't have other people taking responsibility for your lie." He says.
"You have no idea how many times I've covered Lucas' ass." I hiss.
"Amelia I didn't intend to argue with you, I'm just telling you how it is." He says.
"So you're saying I should never had lied to Marshall about this?" I frown.
"No, I'm saying that if your lie backfires on you then you need to take full responsibility." He says.
"I am, ain't I?"
"Not with giving Lucas the fault." He says.
"You just don't get it." I sigh.
"I get that you need someone to blame." He says.
"If Lucas haven't fucked up then Marshall wouldn't had known about Amy." I state.
"No but maybe he had found out later on." He says.
"Maybe." I say.
"You see what I mean, right? I'm not trying to be an asshole but you see what I mean, right?" He asks.
"Yeah.. But I don't think it's fair to put it up like that." I say.
"You did what you did based on your situation which I understand, but it backfired on you and now we have to deal with that." He says softly.
"Yes." I sigh deeply.
"And we're gonna get through this shit." He says and kisses my forehead.
"Yes." I say and kiss his mouth. "We better wake up Amy now."

We go in and wake up Amy, make breakfast and then sit and eat together. Amy is always very silent until we begin to eat, she's just not a morning person.
"There was a man at grandma's house yesterday." Amy tells Ken.
"Okay." Ken says trying to sound interested but he's not doing a good job.
"He drew me." Amy says.
"What?" Ken gets confused.
"Yes Marshall drew Amy." I say.
"Like really good." Amy says. "He was a good drawer."
"Okay." Ken just says again which makes me kick his leg under the table. He should sound more interested and not let this affect Amy. "What else did you do at grandma?"
"Me and the man played some games. He was really sweet daddy." She says excited.
"That's good to hear baby." Ken says smiling. Amy keeps talking about yesterday and Ken acts like he's really interested.

I'm sorry that it took a little longer to update but I've just been operated, so I'm really exhausted and tired :)

What do you think about the chapter? How do you think it's gonna go when Ken is gonna be there at the next companionship?