Just the two of us (book 3)

Chapter 52 Telling Amy

I came home this noon and I told Marshall everything that went on during the interrogation. Marshall is angry. Angry that Jamie reported me and angry that she opened her mouth about everything, angry that she told our family secret and that it's now out for the whole world to watch. This means that Marshall has to make a public statement about this even though he doesn't want to. Looking in the bigger picture then I deserve what's coming to me now. I can't just walk around getting this angry with people and get away with it. Jamie is very young and I should've been the adult in that conflict. Everything that Jamie does now is because she's young and immature, she doesn't really think clearly. Now she's only out to hurt me and Marshall.

Me and Marshall have agreed to tell Amy the truth today. We can't keep isolating her from the real world and we want her to hear it from us. This is gonna be my life toughest thing to do mostly because Amy is gonna see my true color. She's gonna know that her mother has done awful things and hurt people just because I couldn't face the truth. I always thought it was easier to run from things. When I was 18 and left Detroit then I also took the easiest way out. I ran from Detroit, I ran from James instead of seeking help at the people I actually knew would've helped me. I had the boys who would've helped me and made sure that James would never touch me again, but I just ran instead. I didn't tell Marshall because I knew he would fight me, so instead I took the easiest way out and ran from him as well. I never really thought about what my decisions did to people. Back when I was cheating on Kevin then I only cared for my own desire. I loved Kevin and I felt bad but it didn't stop me, you know why? Because Marshall made me feel good. When I got pregnant with Amy then I was too hurt to face Marshall because of his cheating, so once again I was selfish, I didn't think about the consequences it would have for my unborn baby or for Marshall for that sake. Maybe Marshall is right, maybe I am toxic.
How do you even tell your daughter this? How do you explain to her that you're a coward that runs whenever things get tough?

We sit down on the floor with Amy doing some puzzles therefore I think it'll get easier to talk to her. I think it's easier for her to take things in if she's being creative meanwhile.
"Do you like being here?" I ask Amy and she nods as she connects another piece of the puzzle. "Mommy is thinking about moving here to Detroit. Would you like that?"
"We can do that?" She asks showing a little smile as she looks at me.
"Only if you want to." I assure here.
"I like it here." She says and look down at the puzzle again and I now see Marshall connects a piece of the puzzle.
"I'm gonna find you and mommy a house then." Marshall says.
"Are we not going to live with you?" She asks confused.
"No sweetie. Mom and you need to get your own place." Marshall says.
"Why can't we live here?" Amy asks.
"Because Amy.." I say considering my words once again. "It would be weird, you know? Me and Marshall are friends and friends shouldn't live together." I now look at Marshall with a begging look. I don't know how to say this and I want him to help me.
"Do you know how me and your mom became friends?" Marshall asks and Amy now looks at him getting curious as she shakes her head wanting him to go on. "Your mom was 16 years old when she moved to Detroit and I was good friends with uncle Lucas."
"Mom has lived in Detroit before?" Amy asks surprised.
"Yeah twice actually." Marshall says. "I meet your mom through uncle Lucas and I thought she was such a sweetheart." I can't help but smiling when Marshall says that.
"And I found Marshall very complicated but also interesting." I say and catch Amy's attention. She sits listening like she hears a fairytale. Our story is no fairytale but she doesn't need to know that.
"I fell in love with mom from almost the first time I saw her but I didn't wanna admit it, you know?" Marshall tells her followed with a laugh. "But mom softened me up and I fell hard for her."
"Did she become your girlfriend?" Amy asks him.
"She did." Marshall confirms. "But then your mom had to go to college so she could get an education which meant that she had to move."
"But did she come back to you?" Amy asks and Marshall looks at me.
"Yeah, 8 years later." He says still looking at me but then he looks at Amy again. "I loved your mom but thinks was complicated because I was never home, so she moved back to New York."
"And then I found out I was pregnant with you." I say and she looks confused, very confused. "When you were two, I met Ken and he was so sweet to us. You really liked him and he became a big part of your life so you quickly saw him as a father, but he's not your father baby, Marshall is." I let her take it in but she doesn't really say anything. What is there to say? She's five and now she finds out that her father really isn't her father. "How do you feel right now, sweetie? Do you feel sad or what do you feel?"
"I don't know." She says and looks down to the puzzle again.
"Do you feel sad?" I ask and she just shrugs.
"I know that it ain't easy pumpkin but nothing's gonna change much really. You don't have to call me dad, I can still just be Marshall." Marshall now says. I know that he wish for Amy to call him dad but I also know that he doesn't wanna push her. Amy just keeps doing the puzzle and I don't blame her. It's too much for her to take in and this is her way to deal with it.
"I know this is a lot to take in but if you have any questions then just ask baby." I say.
"Ken is not my dad." Amy says still looking down and I don't know if it's a question or a confirmation.
"No." I say softly.
"Is that why he doesn't wanna see me?" She asks looking at me.
"Ken wants to see you Amy but he thinks you and Marshall should get closer to each other since he's your dad." I explain. "That's why he chose to back away."
"Hey, could you leave me and Amy alone?" Marshall asks softly and I look at him confused but I still get up.
"Sure." I say. "I'll be in the kitchen." I'm confused of why I can't be there when he talks to her but I trust Marshall. If he thinks it's better and that he can better talk to her then I trust him. I know he has his own way of explaining things sometimes or handle things. Of course I'm curious but who wouldn't be?
I sit in the kitchen for 20 minutes before I hear laughter from Amy which I guess only is a good sign. A little while after Marshall and Amy comes running out in the kitchen and Amy crawls up on my lap, she throws her hands around my neck and hugs me tightly.
"Oh." I say a little surprised.
"I love you mommy." She says words I haven't heard from her in awhile. I know she loves me but Marshall has been kind of her favorite.
"I love you too baby." I say with tears in my eyes. I don't know what Marshall did or said but I also don't care, all I care about is that he made her happy.

Later

Marshall comes downstairs after putting Amy to bed and I'm just sitting here watching Sons Of Anarchy as I eat my grapes.
"I sure hope you're recording that episode." He says.
"Chill." I say. I know that he's as obsessed with SOA as I am.
"What happened so far?" Marshall asks and throws himself down on the couch next to me.
"Nate just shot Tig because he thought he was fucking Rose." I tell him.
"Let me guess.. he fucked that Mexican chick." Marshall says and I nod.
We sit and watch SOA and right after we just watch the the next thing that they're sending which we don't care much for.
"Amy asked me why we weren't together now." Marshall says and I look at him.
"Upstairs?"
"Yeah." Marshall says. "I think it's hard for her to understand our relationship."
"Me too." I say. I don't know what's really going on between me and Marshall. He's playing me right now and he loves that power thing going on which I like too. He's so oddly sexy taking the control like that.
"As long as you do as I say and be good then it's all good." He smirks and I know that he means it. He wants me to behave and get my shit together, but he also says it in that dominant way.
"I've told you that this thing with Jamie has been a wake up call." I assure him.
"I hope." He says and he takes my arm and pulls me closer to him. "Come here." He says and we lay down on the couch together with him behind me. This is what I mean; suddenly he changes behavior.
"Marshall you're confusing me." I whisper.
"Mmh." He mumbles down into my neck. "You always get confused when you can't have it your way."
"That's a lie." I say offended.
"It's not." He says husky. "You hate that you can't control this but it also turns you on that I'm taking the control."
"But I don't like that you're playing me." I say. He's right.. I hate that I can't control this but his behavior turns me on. At the same time I hate that he's playing me and leaves me frustrated all the time. He doesn't give in and it pisses me off.
"It's not for your amusement." He says and bites my earlobe. "It's for mine."
"But what do you get out of this?" I ask. It's not like he's getting anything.
"Control." He says. I don't get why the fuck he doesn't break.
"So I should expect that you tie me to the bed and shit like that to have control?" I joke.
"Don't give me good ideas Amelia." He says husky and I begin to rub my ass against him. His voice makes me so fucking turned on.
"You're wasting your time." Marshall says. "If that's what I wanted then I would have gotten it already." It's true though but what does he want?
"So you don't want me?" I ask.
"Sure but I like to play." He chuckles. Well I'm tired of this game!
"Like I haven't noticed." I say rolling my eyes.
"Did you just roll your eyes?" He asks rolling us around so I'm on my stomach and he's on top of me. How could he know?
"Am I not allowed?" I giggle teasing him.
"No, it's not very nice." He says husky as he begins to grind his crotch against my ass. I immediately feel how wet I become just from the thought of if he really did fuck me like this.
"Teasing me is not very nice." I say.
"I don't have to be nice." He says and he begins to kiss my neck now.
"Marshall please not today." I breathe heavily and he squeezes my asscheek.
"I'm not doing anything." He says and lifts my ass slightly. "I could be meaner. I could sink my fingers into your wet pussy and make you crave for an orgasm." Oh god.. it makes me so damn wet when he talks dirty to me.
"Please.." I say but we get cut off by his phone. He gets off me and takes the call and I can tell from the conversation that it's Yelawolf, his newest artist.
"I'm just gonna go in the studio." He tells me and gone he is. Fucking hell!

Well guys.. this is my last update on this story before I take some time away from wattpad for a couple of months. I hope y'all had an amazing New Years! I'll see you in couple of months, I'm gonna miss y'all and I look forward to come back and upload some new chapters for you :) don't forget to vote and comment.