London

7 - "I love you."

Alex

"My girl!" Uncle Theo yells as he sees me entering the pub.

He's sharing a table with Sage who smiles as well. Theo get's up from his seat and my eyes look to the chair next to him where dad used to sit. It's empty as if we're still waiting for him. When I'm close enough Theo pulls me in for a hug. Besides his looks he also smells like my father. It's a mixture of smoke, beer and a certain cologne.

"So good to see you," he says, holding me by my shoulders to study my body. "Did you lose weight?"

"Probably the opposite," I laugh. "What about you?"

"Still the same," he says, patting his rather large tummy. "It's good genes I suspect. I can eat whatever I want."

He sits down and I do too kissing Sage on her cheek as a hello. She rolls her eyes for a moment at her father but I can only smile. It's like my father is back for a moment.

"You look the same as always, that's true," I say. "I'm sorry I haven't really seen you for awhile."

"Oh, don't bother! You were busy and living miles away. I can't expect you to stop by here every chance you get. Also Sage has been giving me updates, but it's been quiet for awhile. What's new?" He raises his hands to the bartender and I know he's going to order a beer so I quickly start talking.

"I stopped drinking. Alcohol I mean," I say and he frowns. I imagine how my father would react if I'd tell him. I used to drink a beer from time to time, but never let it get out of control. I didn't really like the taste and only accepted it out of politeness. My father almost expected me to drink and never minded that I did in Palas. So does uncle Theo.

"Why? Are you sick?" He wonders and I realize that's the only reason they'd accept it or understand.

"Not really. I mean, it's not like with my father. It's different. Like more sick in my mind?" I know it comes of the wrong way, but I don't know how else to explain this. For this side of my family drinking is like a religion. You must have a damn good reason to walk away from that. I think it is the same on the other side, but I don't know them.

Seeing my uncle struggle to understand only verifies my reasoning. I know I'm doing the right thing.

"What?" He says after a moment and I look to Sage for help- who isn't drinking either but I suspect for different reasons. She only shrugs her shoulders.

"I uhm... I started to drink for the wrong reasons. At first it was just fun, but it became something I can't do without. Something to make me feel better or forget things and I want to control it. So I started drinking less and recently I decided to stop completely."

"And how is that working for you?" He wonders as the bartender places a fresh beer in front of me.

"Good," I tell him. He doesn't need to know about my mistake at Liam's a couple of days ago. That's in the past and only more reason to push away the beer in front of me right now. "It means more for you."

"That's right," he laughs. "So, what else is new?"

"I got two jobs. One at a bar and one in a shop. I'm trying to find a way to get there more easier. I hate public transportation."

"As did your father. That's why he was so happy he could get you a car. Why did you ever sell it?"

"It got too expensive."

I can see the car clear as day. It was old and even if I still would have it, it probably wouldn't work anymore. But the car gave me a sense of freedom, just like my moped and later bicycle did in Palas. Being dependent on trains to arrive on time sucks when you have to travel through the whole of London.