London

57 - "When you call me Lexie."

Harry

"Hey," I pick up the phone, surprised to see it is Alex. I thought about giving her some time after we met up, and I didn't expect her to be the first to call. "What's up?"

"I wanted to talk to you," she says, and I feel a rock grow in my stomach. I had to correct myself and not ask her what's wrong instead of up. Of course there is something wrong and she wants me to know of it. I brace myself for what is about to come. Did she make up her mind and decided that she rather be with Thomas anyway?

"What about?"

"I just met Rob in prison. Wanted to talk about it with someone."

"Oh," I bring out, feeling relieved. "What was he like?"

"Kind of nice, actually."

"And did he answer all your questions on your list?"

"I don't know. I didn't check. I'm going to throw away that list. I don't want to look back anymore."

"So I take it was a good conversation then?"

"Well, I think so. He basically confirmed what I already thought about her, but it was nice to hear it. She wasn't a heartless bitch like we thought," she says with a laugh.

"What was she like then?" I ask her and she thinks about it for a moment. 

"She was extreme in everything. Addicted to drugs to numb her feelings and thoughts. She might have loved me, but she wasn't capable of showing it. And I shouldn't let that guide the rest of my life, right? I had a father who loved me to pieces, through it all he managed to raise me right."

"He did," I agree. "When I met you, you were wonderful."

"And I'm not wonderful now?" She wonders and I roll my eyes, feeling like a dickhead for the way I said that.

"No, no, I don't mean it like that, but the death of your parents changed you. It made you think of all these things that you are struggling with right now. But the fact that you sound okay after having a conversation with a criminal who broke up your family shows that you are still wonderful. Changed because of all that happened, but still as wonderful as back then."

"Thank you," she says, and from the tone of her voice I can tell that she's smiling. "I'm starting to feel like that person more and more."

"Old-Alex."

"Yeah," she laughs. 

"I prefer just Alex. Old, new, you must see that in the end it makes no difference."

"I know. My eyes are slowly opening."

"I'm happy to hear that," I tell her. 

"So, how are you? Settled down in Brighton?"

Alex and I talk some more as I tell her about the first few nights in Brighton. She laughs when I explain about my sleeping facilities in a shared hostel room and how that is a great test for my snoring. I haven't exactly made friends so I'm doubting staying with this guy called Luke although I'm a bit afraid for a repeat of Pascal.

"Is he your boss?" Alex wonders.

"No, he's not the owner of the shop. And the owner isn't really my boss either. I'm only filling in. Guest artist."

"So, why do you doubt then? If it is only for a few months and he has space and isn't a serial killer?"

"Well, I don't know about that for sure of course. But yeah, maybe I should just give it a go."