London

67 - "I think I want children."

Winter 2022

Alex

"Liam!" I yell after him as I see him hurry down the hall of the hospital. 

He looks over his shoulder, a smile growing on his face when he sees it is not a colleague or a patient, but his best friend.

"What are you doing here?" He wonders.

"Transferring someone," I explain, "a lovely old-lady, ready to go home."

"I see. Well let's hope this one gets to see her home," he says, and I hit his upper arm. 

He's referring to the fact that lately supposedly stable and discharged patients seem to crash before they even get home. It has given me a reputation on the team and in the hospital, but so far only one person actually died. I think it is their fault for discharging them too soon instead of me being a nurse of death. So I can laugh about it, knowing no one actually thinks I'm bad luck.

"Well, you know me. If not today than later."

"Of course. So are you ready for tonight?" I ask him and his face turns ashen. 

"I'm trying not to think about it," he snaps. "Now you have to remind me."

"It will go alright, Liam. She'll say yes."

"I know, but it is fucking scary to do."

"I wouldn't know."

"Well, Harry does. He told me when he was proposing to you, and honestly, I thought he wasn't going to make it."

"He didn't seem that nervous at the time though. It will go alright. You shouldn't make it bigger in your head than it is."

"But it is a fucking big deal, Lex. Getting married is a big deal," he says, clearly scarred of the prospect if Nina says yes.

"Look at me and Harry, has so much really changed since we're married?" I ask him, and it is a genuine one. Now that I think of it, I still feel the same a year later. I don't feel more mature or anything. All that has changed is that we live in a house and maybe there is a deeper connection between us. 

"No," Liam concludes. "Maybe not so much, but it is a huge step. You can't deny that."

 "Of course it is, and it is okay to be nervous. Let me know how it went, okay?"

"I will, got to run though. Don't kill anyone!" He yells over his shoulder and I laugh as I watch him leave. 

****

After I have successfully brought back a lovely old patient home and responded to some emergency calls my partner of the day is nice enough to drop me off back home. I'm happy that in the end we found a place we both like the location and the actual house of. 

"Thanks for dropping me off," I tell Sandra who I work with often. She's my senior in years and work as well. "See you Monday."

"Enjoy your weekend off, love," she says.

"Of course, you too. Bye!"

"Bye!" she yells after I shut the door, watching her drive off. 

Sandra is the one I work with the most and who trained me when I first started out. She's almost fifty years old and has a daughter my age. Maybe it is the fact that she could have been my mother and is nice and proud of me that makes me so happy to work with her. It is much better than working for Nano.

Harry isn't at home yet. He's still at Stories finishing up his last client of the day. Then he's coming over with Jason and expects to have something to eat. I don't mind cooking at all, but I am tired so I give myself some time to relax in the living room.