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Philophobia (I)

fear.......... an unpleasant emotion or thought that you have when you are frightened or worried by something dangerous, painful, or bad that is happening or might happen.

it is a kind of madness, but useful if you know how to use it well.

it will take you by the hand to the things you keep and guard as precious.

Always face fear with courage, understand it, and then let it go.

Let these fears wake you up, let them show you the way to your true self, to the brave soul whose love shines like a star.

but not everyone thinks of it the same way. not to you whose name just as beautiful as yourself. Jang wonyoung. though you never believe you are. for you, fear is your challenge and your demon to slay.

fear will come unannounced and gnarly until you do. and the only way out is to order your brain to function, to demand solutions instead of those crazy-making circling anxiety and phobia.

if you wonder what kind of fear she has, well it is the fear of love or of becoming emotionally connected with another person, often known as philophobia. as we all know, it can significantly impact your life if not treated.

but do you care? No. because you know you can't be treated. 'so why would I bother to try' you often say in your thoughts.

Love is something that is cultivated between two people and grows over time, through getting to know him or her and experiencing life's many ups and downs together. It involves commitment, time, mutual trust, and acceptance.

Although almost no one can agree on a single definition of love, most people do agree that love plays a significant role in both physical and psychological well-being. Numerous studies have demonstrated the benefits of love. Love's role in mental health is far-reaching.

People in this world long for someone to shower them with all the affection and love they could have ever imagined. Love is like a beautiful gift everyone wishes for.

Falling in love was the easy part; it's admitting to yourself that it happened that's hard. You had these very efficient defences for so long and you didn't even notice them. How rude. they were meant for others and you had your own door.

you could ask why, but what's the point?

while love can be one of the most beautiful and amazing parts of life, it can sometimes be frightening too.

some may think it's normal to fall in love, while some find the thought of falling in love terrifying.

wanting to fall in love again.

wanting to open again.

wanting to trust again.

wanting to let someone in again.

but something is holding you back. maybe it's because you're shielding away from any kind of relationship, connections or from anything deep. you're scared. you just don't want to get hurt again.

you're pushing away everything and everyone that tries to give affection to you.

you can't take the risk of being hurt again.

you once gave your heart to people before and what did you get in return? nothing but heartbreak. so now whose fault is it to make you on guard? is it the one that breaks your heart? or the one that never gives back the same amount of love?