venit omittere | 2.0.5

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Yoongi stared at a fuming but confused Hoseok. Hoseok definitely looked taken aback.

"Tell me Hoseok." Yoongi said."What's on your mind? You can talk to me."

"Is this real?" Hoseok whispered. "Both of us. Real. Or is this something caused by what you took? The thing that suppressed your mark that made my body shut down without you."

Yoongi's eyes softened. "Hoseok, this is real. The emotions you feel for me are real. What I feel for you is real. What Jimin told you, it wasn't a lie. Namjoon and Ruby did give me something to suppress my mark. What they gave me, would hurt you while I was gone. But, what Jimin doesn't know is that it also hurt me."

"How do I know you're telling the truth?" Hoseok asked, looking at Yoongi with a pained expression. Yoongi looked away at the expression, his heart breaking at it.

"I wouldn't lie to you like that." Yoongi tapped his bracelet. "Look, I recorded this when Ruby injected the suppressant in me."

Hoseok listened to the audio intently. He sighed in relief at hearing Yoongi's protests, angering at Ruby's indifferent voice.

"The suppressant allowed me to feel everything in training. So everything you felt while your body was deteriorating, I felt ten hundred times more." Yoongi closed his eyes. "It was part of my training. They told me I had to learn to overcome it. That the perfect match link would be a weakness to me, one that I needed to learn to control."

"She said I wasn't the only one that was going to be coaxed into this bond." Hoseok said."You too?"

Yoongi nodded.

"We were both taught through the pain." Yoongi's voice cracked slightly.

"Jimin told me that you also taunted him. Did you do the things you did to make him jealous? To hurt him?" Hoseok inquired. Yoongi's eyes stormed. "Do you even have feelings for me?"

"Everything we feel is real." Yoongi reassured Hoseok. "While in training, I was put through different scenarios. In each one, I had to save a loved one. The first few scenarios were easy for me. My parents, my siblings, those I managed to save. But when it got to you, no matter what I did, I couldn't save you." Yoongi closed his eyes. "You would die in front of me. Over and over. Every time I failed the scenario would change. But it would always be you who I had to save. And you were the only one I couldn't save. You kept dying. From drowning, electrocution, to public execution, poison, through my own hand.

"Each time I failed, the more painful it became. It didn't matter how hard I screamed at the top of my lungs Hoseok. I kept losing you and every time I did I would lose all my senses. Lose them and get them back, feeling pain, misery. That was how they coaxed me into the bond. The fear of losing you grew and grew through each failed scenario. And when I was finally successful in saving you once, I couldn't bear the thought of letting you go ever again. I realized how much I needed you."

Hoseok's heart faltered at the sound of Yoongi's raw voice. He knew that Yoongi was telling the truth because he could feel the pain that Yoongi felt while recalling his training. They are right about Alpha A training being brutal. Looking at Yoongi he knew.

Alpha A training destroyed you.

"The training changed me, Hoseok." Yoongi whispered, caressing Hoseok's cheeks. "I can't stand the thought of losing you. Can't stand the thought of letting you go." He grabbed Hoseok's hand, placing it on his chest."This belongs to you now. It isn't mine anymore. I need you."

Hoseok felt his anger melt away at the sincerity of Yoongi's words. He was still hurt but he could understand why Yoongi acted the way he did.

Still, it wasn't an excuse.

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