Yoon Jeonghan is crying.
He is a kind of man who won’t shed a tear even though you abandoned him in an island without a single penny.
But today… he is crying.
“Are you really going to make me do this?” he sobbed.
You looked at him as he minced the onion on cutting board. It is so cute to see him cry that you couldn’t help it but to laugh. “Hey. It was you who offered help. But you can stop. That amount of onion is enough.” Then you placed the blender and plugged it.
On the other side, Jeonghan got a tissue so he could wipe his runny nose. “I didn’t know that it’s hard to make Kimchi.”
“Don’t you watch your mom when she makes it?” you asked while putting the minced garlic, minced ginger and minced onion, all together in the blender.
“No. I am not a kitchen boy. I don’t enjoy watching cooking show,” he chuckled as he leaned on the sink.
“Then why did you offer help?” Directing your eyes, you watched him laughs without answering your question. “Give me the rice flour,” you asked.
“Oh this.” He handled you a box.
“Not that. That’s baking soda.” You rolled your eyes.
“I don’t know what’s this and that. There’s no label,” he complained, putting the box back its place.
So you shoved him away and get the right ingredients. “Oh gosh. This helper of mine is slowing me down instead.”
“At the first place, why do you need to make a kimchi for us?” Jeonghan opened the refrigerator and got an apple.
“Your parents asked me to do so. Mom said that your maid is sick. So she asked me to make it because they’ll gonna be home next month,” you explained. Then you put the 1 cup of rice flour to a bowl with water.
“Woah. Mom is really mean. Why would she ask her daughter in law to do this?” He said. Jeonghan took a bite on his apple but as soon as he did, he frowned. He forgot to wash his hand so his apple tasted like onion. “Argh,” he groaned and put the apple on the side.
“Yeah. Your family is really mean to me.” Nodding, you mixed the flour and the water together until the grains dissolved. “Your father always nags at me for being poor. Your mother always asked me to do this, to do that as if I’m her maid. Your sister takes me to go for a shopping but she does that so I can carry her paper bags. Yoon Jeonghan, you… you loves to annoy me.” Jeonghan laughed after hearing this. And you continued, "And your brother is…” but you paused. Just thinking about what kind of man his brother is, made you speechless.
“What? Should I continue your words?” Jeonghan smiled bitterly. “My brother is a jerk. A cheater.”
His words fluttered your lungs, that you couldn’t utter anything anymore. He is right. His brother is a cheater.
“Why won’t you divorce my brother? You know that he is cheating on you.” He leaned a little closer to peek at your anxious face.
Of course it is hurt to death that you know how your husband cheats on you. You once thought of divorcing him however…
‘What kind of life I’ll have if I divorce him? I didn’t finish school, I am too old and I have no experience in working outside. I am an orphan who doesn’t have a family to run to. So if I divorce him, I might end up walking at the street as homeless poor divorcee.’ You said to yourself inwardly. There’s no way you’ll reason this to your brother-in-law out loud.
“I don’t know.” You just shrugged your shoulder. “Maybe, I am still hoping that my husband will change. Or there will be a time when he’ll realize that he loves me the way he does before.”
This time, Jeonghan shut his lips. He stared at you with a hidden thoughts he couldn’t share.
“I’m okay,” you lied. After facing his side, you showed him a smile you always wear behind your pain. “Brother in law is nice to me. I am happy that one person is on my side. Thank you Jeonghan. Thank you.”
Jeonghan loves you. Yes he does. But not as the way you think. He loves you as a woman for over 10 damn years! Even before when you weren’t his brother’s girlfriend, he has fallen for you. But he is not a foolish selfish man. Although at the back of his head, he wanted to take you away from his brother, he won’t do it. He knows life is not a novel. If he takes you for himself, what will his family and relatives think of you? In the end, you’ll receive criticism and you’ll see everyone pointing you as the wicked woman who cheated her husband by seducing his little brother.
So he is hiding this ill intention; this bad love, this sin, these feelings that might explode.
However, hearing those words you just said is a torture. For you to be happy just having him on your side is like a gasoline on a fire.
Jeonghan clenched his fist as he avoided your gaze. That’s right. He needs to calm down.
“Oh, can you get me the pan?” you asked in the midst of at the drama. When he was about to get it, a man came in.
“Yes babe. Don’t worry. My wife is at home. She won’t…” The man stopped his sentence when he saw you at the kitchen.
Your eyes went to him and to his arms over the pretty lady on his side. Every bit of your muscles trembles on the sight. Seeing your husband cheats on you right in front of your face is far worse than just simply knowing it.
‘Don’t cry. Please. Don’t cry’ you begged inwardly as you bit your lower lip.
“Hey, you son of a-” Jeonghan couldn’t continue his curse because they have the same mother. “You jerk,” he said this instead.
But instead of being apologetic, your husband complained, “Jeonghan. Why didn’t you tell me that she is here?”
“What?” Jeonghan furrowed his brows.He really wanted to punch his older brother right now!
“Babe, let’s go to a hotel instead,” Your husband sweetly said this to his woman as he pulled her out.
“That freak-” Jeonghan was about to follow him but you grabbed the tip of his shirt. So he looked back at you who are at the verge of crying.
“I’m okay. I’m okay,” you keep saying this repeatedly lies.
“You’re okay? CAN YOU JUST PLEASE…!” Jeonghan brushed his face with his palms. “Oh sh*t. How can you be okay?!”
Tears fell down. As if the wall you built in your eyes crumbled down.
“I’m not okay,” finally, you said this word. “I am not okay so stay here. Don’t follow him. Stay here because what I really need your presence right now,” You sobbed.
Jeonghan is looking at your tears. To your trembling lips. To your tight grip on his shirt. The woman he loves is crying. If only you didn’t marry his brother, if only he is your man…
Everything is clouding his clear mind. Seeing you cry hurts him a million times. This feelings inside him is overflowing. It could explode. It might. It will.
So…
“Stop crying,” he begged. “Stop.”
You lifted your head to look at him with your blurry eyes.
“STOP CRYING WILL YOU?!”
But you can’t. You definitely can’t. When someone tells you to stop crying, why does it became harder to do so?
“I’m s-sorry,” you sobbed. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m so-”
“DAMN!” Jeonghan shouted, cupping your cheeks as he smashed his lips on yours.
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