LOVE or DIE • J.JK FF ✓

CHAPTER: 44

JANE'S p.o.v

We were again in the same dining place, where we had our first dinner together including me.

It was as if deja Vu. But with different feeling. It was as if home.

I still remember the hate I had for these men when I arrived here, now I'm getting along and laughing with them. Time didn't work here, it was as if I was used to them, used to their humour, laughter and happiness.

I really want to get rid of this feeling, it will be hard for me the day I leave this place. I want to go back to Koral and uncle. If you ask me why not my father? Honestly, I don't even know if he exist or is my father. He is just going with the flow by calling himself a father, I don't think he ever took me as a daughter,  those glaring eyes whenever he saw me in front of his office, his strict eyes when ever I made a mistake on the ground. I know some are strict, cold and scary but they do hold love. But my father, never once was worried. I always keep my hope that maybe he is just this way, maybe he worries about me alone , or deep down in his heart. But it never came to my mind that I don't exist in his eyes.

And that long lost feeling was awakening again, that was because of these boys. Jin, with his cooking he made me happy. Namjoon, reading me story books every night before I sleep. Hoseok, teaching me his strong and hipping dance moves. Yoongi, well he taught me how to sleep effortlessly. Taehyung and Jimin always making mischief with me, Jungkook.....I just don't know how it happened.

How I came to love this boy more than I do myself. It was just amusing.  And I was scared, scared to the point that it doesn't matter if I get hurt, it matters when he gets hurt. It matters when I see him in the verge of tears.  It matters when he starts to move away from me when I ask something.

I just couldn't pin point on where and when did I fall in love.

I  wanted to make his nightmares vanish, his past that haunts him to vanish. But it's hard when he doesn't tell me the reason. I want to help him. I want him to...stop Jane. You are doing the same. At the end, you're going to hurt him anyways. Because your stupid ass wants to go back.

I know I might not live well after running from here, he will haunt me when I'm away from him.  Distant, cold. I want him to return to his usual cold and distant self. But seeing him stealing glances at me, smiling goofily, just makes it harder.

It amuses me he still didn't make any move on me, sexually. It's like another side of him, a side that resembles a bunny with cute smile and doe like eyes. The first sight and attention was his eyes.

Finishing with the dinner, helping him with dishes you slump on the couch. The others were busy playing games, I didn't tag along. I wanted to clear out my mind.

I remember his words so clearly.

"Jane, you know that if your father knows, he will do anything to kill them." Clement says, trying to move close to me, I back away, he looks at me with sad eyes.

"Was he ever my father to begin with?" You dare to look in his eyes with a deathly glare, he shuts up for a while. The music in the back was soft and hazy.

"Even though he never cared of your feelings, he still holds the father title. He holds on to you, means he has a reason to keep you alive. And the reason behind it, it just disgusts me." He says, hands clutched in a fist. His hands were trembling and I was confused.

What was it that every body knew of my father but I don't?

"Get straight to the point, Clement. Don't bush around here, don't bring my father in this." You snap.

"Jane, I want you to go back with your life. You don't belong here, with them.
Go back to Koral, other wise he will surely hunt down your trace. I've seen how much you care for these boys, so to see them alive you need to run away. Run away before it's too late. Because your father has already started with the planning."

I still couldn't explain myself, what was my father planning. What was the reason he kept me alive? If he was planning to kill the boys, I surely wouldn't let that happen. If that means to run away from them, I'll do it. If that means to see them alive, I'll do it.

My head tilts back,  eyes closed.

I started to question my entire existence. I didn't notice somebody sitting beside me until his arms snaked around my waist.

My eyes flicked open and stared at the man, soft doe eyes staring at me innocently.

"Tired?" He asked.

I shook my head, "just something's eating my head."

"What is that thing?" His eyes searched for mine, he was dead serious.

"What, you're going to kill that thing?" I joke and he nods.

I giggle at him, "You want to kill my mind?"

"Oh, the thing is your mind?" He asked.

I nod, before I could even protest, he scooped me into his arms and let me sit on his laps.

"Let me go. The boys will see." I say.

"Let them." He casually said, his hands rubbing my hips.

I gasp and hit his shoulder, I couldn't help but caress his cheeks and jawline. Gazing my thumb over his cheeks, his eyes softly closes, damn he had the same length eye lashes as me.
He leans his head to dip it on my neck, he was resting his head on my collarbone. My arms wrapped around his shoulders bringing him closure, my skin tingled when he left soft kisses on my neck.

"I love you." He whispered.

My heart melted at his voice, he was so nervous when he said this, I could tell by his breath that came out shaky.

Resting my cheeks upon his head, I caressed his hair, "I love you too."