He Makes Me Happy (Shyan Fanfic)

Restraint

It was Friday and Shane was staring blankly at his computer screen, begging for the day to come to an end. This entire week had been horrible so his thoughts were focused solely on going home. All he had to do was finish this one report and he could go home. Ricky was sitting in their conjoined office as well, his attention focused on sharpening his multitude of knives. Next week they would start their actual work and his excitement to be working as an assassin again was evident. 

Ricky's eyes flicked up from his work to Shane for the thousandth time as a hungry flame began growing. He had a game plan now and if he acting on his impulses now he might just ruin that. It certainly wasn't helping that Shane had started wearing that necklace. It wasn't too much of a hindrance though, as he just pretended like the R engraved on it was for Ricky. 

Shane couldn't stop thinking about what he had told Ryan. It felt so freeing to finally talk to someone about what he's been thinking for so long, but he felt shameful. Ricky had always been by his side and stuck with him through everything. It seemed selfish to even consider leaving Hell. He shook the thoughts from his head and focused on the task at hand. 

"You've been acting different" Ricky announced, suddenly by Shane's side. He looked into Shane's blank eyes and tried to figure out what was behind those walls he put up. Shane had been more closed off ever since they had been back to work. 

"You know I don't like it here" Shane said as a cover-up. There was no point in talking about what was actually on his mind. Their relationship had changed over the past month or so and it wasn't a particularly good change. Shane felt trapped in the friendship and saw it more as an obligation than something that made him happy. 

"Are you sure that's all?" Ricky asked, his eyes suddenly fixating on Shane's neck. He found himself having to resist the urge to reach out and touch him right now. To satiate the need he placed his hand on Shane's shoulder and felt his warmth seep into his hands. It had become a guilty pleasure when they sparred to feel Shane's coarse hands and listen to his raspy breath. Every day he was falling more and more in love with Shane, which only made his need for Shane to stay in Hell more desperate. 

"I'm fine, just tired" It wasn't a complete lie, the more time he spent in hell the more worn out he was. It was a weight that started out barely noticeable in the morning but began to drag him down throughout the day. 

"You know, you don't have to go home" Ricky said without thinking. His eyes wouldn't leave the back of Shane's neck as he craved his touch. 

Shane laughed. "I want to go home, this place sucks" 

"No, I mean... you could just come to my house. I know portals take a lot of your energy" Ricky said quickly, his hand slowly moving from Shane's shoulder to his neck. 

Shane shook off his touch and stood up, now towering over Ricky. "Maybe some other time"

Ricky couldn't allow him to leave just yet. Maybe it had something to do with the low light of the office, or that Shane had his glasses on, but something was making Ricky desire him much more fiercely than usual. 

"Wait, hold on" Ricky said, reaching out for Shane's hand to stop him just before he stepped through the portal. 

"What is it? I have to get home or Ryan will be worried" Shane said, looking back at Ricky.

All of his words stopped in his throat when Shane said his name. "Nevermind, see you tomorrow" He quickly recovered and released Shane's hand. He disappeared into the mirror, leaving Ricky in the uncomfortable stillness of the empty office. 

He felt like a hollow shell as reality settled in. There was no way Shane would've accepted his advances, at least not yet. Ricky had to help him realize that were meant to be together. Shane was essentially blind to everything that would be good for him. Like staying in Hell, and staying with Ricky. 

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"Ry?" Shane asked, walking into the apartment. He couldn't see if Ryan was in the living room because his eyes hadn't adjusted to the light. 

"Shaaaaaane" Ryan slurred, getting up from the couch to greet Shane. 

Shane laughed fondly as he wrapped his arms around Ryan and kissed his cheek. "How drunk are you?" 

"Very" Ryan admitted, giggling along with him. "How was your day, baby?"

"Terrible as always" Shane said quietly. "But more importantly, what have you been up to?" he asked, sitting down on the couch with Ryan leaning on his shoulder. 

"Oh yeah" Ryan laughed, somehow forgetting how drunk he was. Shane could smell the alcohol on the alcohol mixed with Ryan's cologne. "After you said you had to work late, I went out for drinks with Steven"

They continued to chat mindlessly about their days, Ryan laughed a lot more and much louder than usual. Shane slowly felt the weight of the melt away as he carried on the carefree conversation. However, the bliss he felt in the moment was soured as Ricky was brought into the discussion. 

"He was acting kinda weird today" Shane mentioned, remembering the weird interaction just before he left to go home. 

"How so?" Ryan asked, trying not to let his voice portray his burning curiosity. He was getting more and more suspicious of Ricky every day. He twirled the necklace around Shane's neck and his eyes glittered at the memory. 

"He was a lot more touchy than usual and kept staring at me" Shane explained with a sigh, trying to decipher the behavior. 

"Can I say something insane?" Ryan asked, knowing this was a bad idea. Shane made a sound of encouragement so Ryan continued. If he was sober there was no way he would say this, but any notion of being reasonable was thrown out the window hours ago. "I think Ricky is in love with you"

Shane forced out a laugh, but Ryan didn't join him. "That is insane" 

"Is it?" Ryan asked, his expression becoming stoic. 

"We've been friends for years, if he wanted to try something he would've already" Shane reasoned, not fully believing his words. 

"Maybe he just realized" there was no stopping now, he was committed to this conversation. He just prayed this wasnt going to turn into an argument.

Shane paused and considered his words for a moment. He hoped to God it wasn't true, but Ryan's words started to resonate. The stolen glances, the blush that spread across his face whenever they fought, it all pointed to one unpleasant truth. 

Ryan continued. "What you do if he was?" His voice was quieter as he began growing tired. He wasn't exactly drifting off to sleep, but he was going to be soon.

"What do you mean?" Shane asked, looking down at Ryan with one eyebrow raised. "Reject him, duh"

"Yeah... duh" Ryan whispered with a small, warm smile.