| chapter thirty nine |

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" Goodbye may seem forever

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" Goodbye may seem forever. Farewell is like the end but in my heart is the memory and there you will always be. "

•◇•

THE SUNLIGHT beaming through her curtains is what woke her, her senses slowly coming to. Her legs stretched out, untangling slowly from Stephen's. Her eyes fluttered open, gold shining brilliantly. She felt the aching pain already, but relished in the fact she could stay in bed longer. She turned awkwardly in the bed sheets, facing the man she shared her bed with. A deep breath left her mouth, as her mind did backflips. She wasn't sure if she felt guilty or not. Zaiya never ever wanted to see Stephen so upset again.

His hair was a mess, eye bags deeply inset on his face. He looked razzled last night, almost scared. That fear was stronger than the one he felt towards her new powers, it was the fear of losing her.

It was so awkward and strange to her. If there was one lesson she had learnt in her life it was to keep to yourself and not get too attached to others. They would all end up leaving one way or another and in her line of work, it was set in stone. She cursed at her heart, it's power overwhelming her brain at each step. Stephen was the worst of it. The pull she felt was impossible to ignore, the fear of heartbreak nothing but a distant worry over the horizon.

Zaiya pinched herself subconsciously, wondering if it was all a dream. If someone told her a few weeks ago that she would have not only Stephen but her friends back she wouldn't have believed them. Yet here he was, like he never left.

But that was half the problem. He did leave. For five years. Zaiya groaned, the thoughts in her mind beginning to repeat themselves. She thanked the spirits when a loud knock on the door gave her an excuse to get up.

Once redressing and getting used to walking again, she trotted down the stairs, whoever their guest was knocking again. Zaiya quickened her pace, reaching the door and swinging it open.

"Steve? Didn't expect to see you." Zaiya smiled, leaning on the door frame.

"I hope it's not too early." Steve chided, a soft smile on his face.

"No, no not at all. I'd just gotten up. What can I do for you?"

Steve's face went solemn, like he had bad news. Fear struck Zaiya's heart, fearing the worst. Something had gone wrong, he wouldn't be here otherwise.

"Steve...what's happened?" She asked again, now standing straight and furrowing her brows.

"Nothing. Nothing. It's just...I'm taking back the stones today." Steve finally replied, shuffling his feet.

"Oh...okay. What's bothering you then?" Zaiya asked, pressing further.

Her mind began to race, thinking about what could possibly be bothering him so much. They knew where the stones were going, they certainly had them all. All he had to do was go back in time and...

"You're not coming back, are you?" Zaiya asked, tears welling in her eyes.

"I think I might try some of that life Tony told me to get. It suits you so..." Steve admitted, a sad smile on his face.

Zaiya's tears began to fall, and she wasted no time in embracing him into a deep hug. Steve wrapped his arms around her, squeezing tightly onto a friend he would cherish forever.

"I'm happy for you, Steve. You deserve it. She deserves you." Zaiya said, slightly muffled by his shoulder.

"You deserve it too, Zaiya. If I'm chasing mine, chase and hold onto yours." Steve said, stepping back and placing both hands on her shoulders.

"Sounds easy when you say it."

"Make it easy. You two deserve each other. He's a good man. Tony would want it for you too."

Zaiya bit her lip, knowing he was right.

"Curse you Steve Rogers and your words of wisdom. Can't believe I'll miss it." Zaiya joked.

"Ouch."

"Oh shut up. You know I will."

"I know. I think Thor wanted to see you too, said to pass along an invite to New Asgard." Steve said, shrugging his shoulders.

"Spirits. I'll reach out. Thanks Steve...for everything."

"And thank you, Zaiya. Till next time."

Steve leant down and placed a tender kiss on her cheek, embracing her in a hug one last time. Zaiya tried to keep the tears in, but she was awful at it. This goodbye hurt, but it felt good at the same time. There was no one else who deserved this happiness more than Steve Rogers. A soldier who had already given his life and fought to do it all over again for the rest of the universe.

Zaiya watched him turn and walk down the street before getting into a black car. Once he was out of sight, she softly closed the door and rested her forehead against the wood. Any attempt of stopping her tears broke then, soft sobs echoing throughout the atrium.

"Zai?" Stephen's soothing voice called out from behind her, followed by his soft footsteps coming down the stairs.

She twisted on her heel, meeting his comforting eyes. His heart panged in worry as he watched tears stream down her cheeks.

"What happened, love? Are you okay?" He hurriedly said, taking large strides to get her in his arms.

"Just saying goodbye...Steve...he. He's taking back the stones but doesn't intend to return. Live the life he wanted." She mumbled into his chest, sniffling.

"Ah. Will breakfast make you feel better?"

Zaiya nodded, taking his hand as they walked to the kitchen, her breath still shaky.

•◇•

Zaiya was sure it must be a sick joke now, Thor embracing her in a warm hug amongst the sun and grass of New Asgard.

"Today officially sucks." Zaiya muttered, sniffling.

"I am sorry." Thor replied, patting her head softly.

"No, no. Don't be sorry. It's just...for a world that has gained half its population back I sure do seem to be losing more than I'm gaining."

"It's not forever. I'll be back, no doubt. I'll bring you souvenirs!"

Zaiya laughed, wiping her nose.

"I'll take that as a promise."

"Promise."

•◇•

Zaiya and Stephen spent their night together, watching some of his favourite movies. It made her feel so much better, so much so she had an ephinany. The loss of today hurt, saying goodbye to her close friends. All that remained of the original Avengers was herself, Bruce and Clint. Yet, through loss she had gained so much. She fought alongside an extraordinary group of people and won. Sure, it brought its own set of problems but as she laid on the chest of the man she loved...perhaps the problems were worth it.

If Steve could finally have his dance, perhaps Zaiya could take the dance floor too.

•◇•

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