"... i don't think you'll ever fully comprehend how you made my dreams come true, or how you've open my heart to love and the wonders it can do, i'm internally great full for you- us..."
waking up while being between pierre's arms will never get old, he looks so uncomfortable that it makes me giggle a little bit watching him sleep like that just to have me close to him. i try to get up slowly not wanting to wake him up and have a few more hours of sleep while i go to my appointment today. i turn him to his side so he's more comfortable, the last thing i want for him is to have back and neck pain just from sleeping, the car does that enough already. i head to the bathroom for a quick shower when i notice for the first time that i'm showing even when i've just woken up, which means the baby is growing hitting me with realization of how insane and real this is, it's like since the moment i meet pierre my life has gone full speed ahead i can't find the emergency brake, even the season is almost over with only a couple of races left.
i try not to think back to mykonos where everything started but if you see my life at that time and my life now pregnant with this amazing guy, who's totally not perfect but totally worth it ooo and happens to drive fast cars in circles around the world, it makes you laugh to even think something like this could ever happen to someone normal like me, which makes me wonder sometimes what my life could've been if i had gotten off this trip that has no end. i don't necessarily think of it in a bad way, it's more of a curiosity because i had goals and dreams before pierre came and made me fall in love with him.
life can really change from one single moment to an other.
i leave the bathroom after my shower and skincare, i stop my mind from think about the past before it wonders off even more. i get change and give pierre a kiss before heading to the kitchen, wanting to wait a bit before waking heidi up but she's already waiting for me.
"hey you're up!" she looks happy and rested but i can see in her eyes that something is off and she's trying to put a brave face.
"hey, i was gonna let you sleep a little more" i opened the frigid getting some lemon water and ice "did you sleep okay?" i asked as i leaned against the kitchen counter.
"yeah i did but my sleep routine is all over the place, i got up an hour ago".
"okay well the appointment is not for another two hours so i was thinking we can get some breakfast on the way" the doctors office is 40 minutes away so we're good on time, i search for my keys and purse when i notice she never answered me, i turn around looking for her attention and see her mind has wonder off "you okay?".
"yeah yeah, fine sorry, let me go get my phone" she left the room before i could even say anything. something is definitely bothering her but i don't know if it's my place to say something because our friendship is new and i don't know how far is to far in asking about personal stuff, i figure if she wants to share with me her emotions she would've by now. but i can't help think about her face when she zoomed out, i don't want to make her uncomfortable coming to the appointment if that's the problem or pushing her into talking to me but i'm worried. if she felt uneasy coming i know she would tell me, at least i think.
i went back to our bedroom to also grab my phone and give one more kiss to pierre before leaving.
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