Nat x Wanda x Yelena One Shots

Bipolar [different version] pt. ? - n.r.

[Reader...]

I have always felt useless.
Everyone is better without me.

Hell, i don't even have powers good enough for the Avengers. Or at least i have no idea how to work them.

I'm getting messages constantly from my father, harassing me. And American police don't help, telling me i am only have a small argument with my dad and i should stop being a little asshole.

Everything is my fault, really.

The last time i went on a mission Tony screamed at me for almost getting him killed.

Then Fury had a wack at me putting me into training for hours and hours in my day causing my muscles to ache.

My girlfriend Natasha is currently out on a mission for a week and a half, but even as we text i feel like all i do is bother her. So i stop texting as much. I cry myself to sleep, only to have nightmares and wake up screaming. But i don't tell her that.

I haven't eaten a proper meal since she left, but i won't tell her that.

She calls me to tell me how much fun she's having on her mission, so i keep quiet. Afraid by the time she comes back my low will be worse than before and i wont be able to fight it off anymore.

I haven't seen her face in so long, and i miss it. Heard her voice.

As i finish my training i decide to go to my room after a shower, immediately laying collapsing into my bed. I don't move. Even when Buck comes to get me for dinner. I stay in my place, too mentally exhausted to even try to act like i want to be at the dinner table with the rest of my hero friends.

So i stay here.

In my own void, the mist of my own misery. I stay in the darkness of the sanity of my own room.

A part of me hopes Natasha stays away longer, knowing how happy she is away from me, i don't want to ruin that. Not like how my father ruined it for me and my family.

I see it coming.

All of the sadness and anger.

All i can see is myself turning into him, and it makes me wish Natasha stays away. So i don't break her. Save her the heartbreak and pain that comes from loving a Santos.

My father, Leandro, ruined me. He ruined my mom. He ruined my brothers. My brother takes on his toxic traits unknowingly and is slowly ruining his wife.

The chains of a family that just can't be broken. I'll forever be in love with Natalia Romanova, but i never want to hurt her in such a way.

As my mind continues to circle in the same thoughts, building upon one another, i didn't notice the red head that silently snuck into the room.

"Is everything okay?" She asks, i look over my shoulder lazily looking at Wanda with a concerned look on her face. I nod before turning back over. Just leave me alone.

"I'm not leaving, what's wrong?" She asks again, now sitting on the bed, her touch burns my skin, i don't want to be touched. So i scoot further into the bed not wanting to be touched.

During these times only Nat is allowed to touch me. It's another sign i'm in for a bad crash with depression. It's a sign i should call for a S-619 code Tony and Nat made for me when i can't actually speak to get myself help.

I can use it, or anyone concerned for me. The code is a suicidal code, meaning i either want to do something to myself only to hurt, or do something to not be here anymore. I don't know which one i am at the very moment. I am leaning more towards grabbing something sharp and putting it against my thigh..

A part of me wants to call Natasha and tell her to come home, that i need her. But i know how her missions are important to her, and she would never come without reason.

So i wont call it.

"I'm just exhausted from my workout Wands." I fake a yawn.

She raises an eyebrow at me before sighing.

"I really don't want to have to read your mind-"

"Then don't" i mumbled a bit too harshly, Wanda puts her head down in defeat but reluctantly nods.

"You know what code to call for if things get too bad" she sighs before kissing my head, the spot where her lips were burns. The only thing that could soothe it would be Nat, but shes not here.

I think about my options, on whether i should go into the bathroom and pull out my best friend at the moment, or stay in bed and sleep for god knows how long.

I look at my phone to see if Nat had replied to my goodmorning text just yet, hoping maybe a small text from her would lighten me up enough to go down for movie night with the rest. But the text reads..

Sent 2h ago

I sigh. Maybe she's busy.

I pull the blanket over my head so people would think i was asleep, even if i wasn't. My heart hurts.

I want my girlfriend, but in this moment i am almost glad she isn't here to witness me being a pathetic good for nothing loser.

Like my father says i am.

If she were here i probably would have done something in order to get her upset and angry with me.

Like my father did to my mother.

Maybe its best she isn't here.

In that sense she doesn't gave to see me failing her consistently, even when she isn't here.

She deserves someone better, i sigh again turning on sad but slow music for myself to immerse in.

She deserves someone who won't turn out like their father.

She deserves the world. I start to cry myself to sleep as my eyes droop, not hearing the fan on in my room, nor the soft music i had.

Soon enough my body gave into its own exhaustion sleeping my day away.

If i could, i would give her the world. She doesn't deserve any if this i sigh as my i begin to dream.

I need some ideas, if u have an idea on what you would like me to add on to this story. What would you guys like to see?