What's that? Two chapters? Mhm, there you go memes !!!!
Also slight slight slight chance of t/w but I'll tell you just in case!
S/h trigger warning x
Dan's P.O.V
Phil hasn't stopped fidgeting and smiling since we left the café.
I'm so glad we're back to normal again, honestly these last few days, haven't gone so well.
I called my dad, after weeks of not speaking, to conclude;
• My sexuality is none of his business
• We can't remain, in contact, its too difficult and though I'll still talk to mum and Adam , I can't bare to speak to him after what he's done to me, and made me do to Phil
• I'm in love with Phil.
As if momentarily Phil's head lulled back onto my shoulder, and he sighed.
"Hey Dan?" He whispered.
"Yeah?" I asked.
"I forgot to mention earlier but.. Me and Alex aren't together anymore and I don't want to talk about it much but I'll just say, its complicated".
I smiled, he's always been too sweet for Alex.
"I understand Phil, it's okay, I won't ask any questions, other than, are you okay? " I mumbled.
"I'm okay, don't worry Bear". He said closing his eyes.
I felt like my heart would burst right there, bear?
Things were far better than back to normal.
No matter how I feel for Phil, I can't act on it, Phil shows no sign of feelings for me, and plus, after everything I put him through, I don't want to hurt him any further, I kind of dug my own grave.
It's good to see Phil so happy, he's been so worried about PJ recently, Chris moved out only a week ago and Phil doesn't think PJ can cope on his own.
Chris needed space, time to figure himself out and we could hardly say no, it's clear he hasn't been himself lately and Peej knows that better than anythe.
I thought back to these past 3 months, since Chris and PJ's party, I've been, beaten, bruised and rejected.
But I didn't feel bad for myself, I toyed with Phil, I did as my dad told me, and tore my skin apart while doing it.
I got drunk and pushed Phil around.
And honestly I'm the worst person for it, but never again.
I felt awful for Phil, ever since that stupid mistake kiss at the party I've fucked things up.
But nothing bad anymore.
Only good surprises.
I just need to fix everything, because I don't care about my sexuality, I don't need to decide right now, but I am in love with my best friend, for real and really I always have been.
And I think Japan, is going to be a fresh start, a fresh me.
It's going to be okay, and that's the first time I can confidently say that for 3 months.
Yoyoyo just letting you know, I deleted a chapter bc I wasn't happy with it, so if the numbers are really wrong now with chapters, that's why !!
Ok hope this chapter was okay.
