Phil's P.O.V
"Peej?" I croaked through the phone.
My throat had been sore since I left the party. Me and Dan returned in silence and headed straight to our rooms, where we've been for almost 2 hours.
"Phil? Oh hey, sorry it's still crazy here, I'll go out into the hall if you want to talk, hang on a sec" He said back projecting his voice, he sounded sober enough to help.
"Sup?" He said finally in a quiet environment.
"I- I don't know what to do PJ" I said, my stomach gurgled unsurely inside and my hands begun to shake uneasily.
"Phil? Calm down, talk me through it" he said after a moment. I loved PJ so much, he always listened, even when he there was a much more fun party he could be at right now, he just knew I needed him more.
"O-okay... Before me and D-dan left your apartment" I hesitated before speaking his name. "We were drunk. I don't remember much, maybe when I've sobered up and I've gone through the hangover I'll remember detail. But I don't want to remember any of it Peej! Dan and me... We kissed- He asked for it! But he was so drunk! Senseless, and I don't know what to do!" I whimpered into the phone and sitting back on my bed.
"Well, Phil you need to ask yourself question one, do you have feelings for Dan?" PJ said softly, still calm.
"Do I have feelings for Dan" I repeated a few times.
What do I think of Dan? Dan. A small dimple planted on each cheek when he smiles, Oh my god, his smile makes my day, he has his polite smile, but his genuine smile when I get him to laugh is my favourite thing in the world. Then his eyes, I stare into his brown eyes and find myself getting lost in them as they search mine the whole look, gives me the urge to love him.
"I don't like Dan Peej" I whispered.
"Second question. What is love to you? This isn't about Dan... But it should help clarify your feelings a bit" he mumbled back.
I sighed at stared down at my feet.
"I don't know if there's any, real definition of love, its definatley more than just a feeling. It's based around a person, who means something to you, and who matters, and you would do anything for that person. Its like, a piece of your heart that was missing and when you're with that person, it doesn't feel empty anymore. Its where, you look at somebody, and you know, you would do anything for that person, because they make you a better person and You care about them more then yourself... So yeah" I said, tears rolled down my cheeks and my breathing hitched and became uneasy. "And I love Dan" I croaked through the thickness of my voice.
"I know, Shh, Phil its okay." He coughed out. Was PJ crying too?
"Peej? I may be out of line, but.. Do you have f-feelings for Chris?" I asked steadily.
I heard it, the crack in his voice that came from the back of his throat that had been waiting there for a while.
"Yeah, at least you have felt Dan's lips at least once, I would sell my soul to the cat gods for a kiss from Chris... I'm such a poet" he chuckled tearily.
"Peej, we can help each other. We can get through this I promise!" I said firmly.
"Love is selfish" He finally muttered.
"Yeah, it is" I sighed.
