Somewhere, Someday

82

Song of the chapter: In Case by Demi Lovato

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"Pictures in my pocket are faded from the washer, I can barely just make out your face. Food you saved for later, in my refrigerator, it's been too long since later never came. I know, one day eventually, I know one day I'll have to let it all go. But I keep it just in case."

The sun comes through the window, the bright light shining through my closed eyelids. Clair and I always forgot about closing the blinded before bed so the sun wouldn't wake us every morning.

I didn't want to lift my body out of bed today, especially after last nights spectacular event. I had gone ballistic, becoming the stupid jealous ex-girlfriend. It probably made me look weak and childish, which is why I hated jealousy. My mind was telling me not to say anything stupid, but my heart had all the control over my actions. My heart always ruled my actions when it was about Harry.

Clair starts shuffling in her bed, the light waking her up as well. I just wanted to close my eyes and pretend like I was still asleep. Today was Saturday, so in reality I didn't really need to leave the bed or room until Monday.

It was comforting knowing I could just hide away from the world for awhile, just get away from what gossip people talk about. I'm hoping Kendall didn't go around, telling people on campus what I had said to her the other night. My apology was as sincere as it could get, but even then I was faking it.

Kendall had just been the perfect girl, perfect for Harry in a sense that she was pretty and had female organs. I'd like to think Harry is just looking for someone to walk around with, or tell people about just for fun. I really just hoped he wasn't sleeping with her.

The bed across from mine makes a squeaking noise, the noise it always makes when Clair gets up and out of bed. She was up too early for me, I still wanted it to be the dead of night. Nobody can see me hiding away in the darkness at night.

Clair walks over to my bed, standing over me. She pulls the covers off my body, instantly making my whole body frozen. "Wake up Sarah." There was a certain harshness in Clair's voice that I don't hear often, but when I do I know she means business.

"Can't I just stay in bed all day and be happy here? Why must you ruin my isolation plan?" I shield my eyes with a spare pillow, trying to escape the bright sunlight telling me to wake up.

"No, you need to go out and look happy." Clair let's out a loud breath, sitting down on the floor beside my bed. "You'll look weak if you let this breakup totally consume you, your heart, body, soul, and mind." I pick at a loose thread in my blanket, thinking about what Clair said. She was right in a way, but I also just wanted to sulk in the breakup for once.

The whole breakup has revolved around Harry and I yelling at each other, as we usually like to do. I just wanted to watch crap movies, eat junk food, and sleep all day. I just wanted to make this breakup seem normal and much less painful.

"I hate when you're right, especially when I want you to be wrong." I sit upright on my bed, getting rid of the spare pillow I had been using as a shield. My eyes had finally adjusted to the light. Maybe my heart will adjust to the pain it was feeling.

"How are you feeling about the breakup anyways? You never said anything specific really." My mind runs through moments of Harry and I, laughing in each other embrace, just being happy.