Meet the Howlters

I've Been Thinking Too Much

YEAR: 2044

[Delilah's POV]

"Princess, are you ready for your doctor's appointment?" I asked as I got my coat on.
"Yes mummy," she mumbled.
"Are you sick today?" I asked. I placed the back of my hand on her forehead to see if she was sicker than usual.
"Kinda," she sighed. "My tummy hurts,"
"I know baby," I pouted. "Come on. Dad! Bear! We're leaving!"
"Want me to come with you?" dad offered.
"We'll be fine,"
"Come on," he said. "This would be your first time going out alone with her. You're scared and stressed... Do you think being alone with your daughter for the first time and fear go well together?"
"No..."
"Let me get my jacket and I'll meet you in the car,"
"Okay," I said. "Do you want your hat, princess?"
"Yes please," Fiona whispered.
"Okay," I smiled as I put her little beanie on her head. "There you go," I said. "You're so pretty,"
"Thanks mummy," she giggled.
"After all this, you're still my happy little girl,"
"Don't forget brave," dad added.
"Yes, of course. You're the bravest person I have ever met," I smiled as I tickled her stomach.
"Mummy," she frowned. "My tummy doesn't feel good!"
"Awe, I'm sorry baby, I forgot," I said as I hugged her. "Dad, let's go,"
"I'm coming princess."

***

"Hi," I said as I carried Fiona into the doctor's office. "Fiona Howlter,"
"10:30 chemo appointment?" the receptionist mumbled.
"Yes,"
"Go right in. Third chair,"
"Thanks," I said.

Dad held the door open for me as I carried my tired daughter into the room. I took a seat in the chair and sat Fiona on my lap. I wasn't supposed to be in the chair with her but, they let me, considering her age and fear of needles.

"Fiona, baby, hold mummy's hand. Squeeze it when your arm hurts,"
"Okay mum," she whispered.
"Ready Fiona?" her nurse asked.
"Yes," she lied.
"Squeeze mummy's hand," I whispered as I held her in my lap.
"Mummy," she whined as he kicked her legs. "It hurts!"
"I know baby," I said.
"And it's in. See? It doesn't hurt anymore," the nurse smiled. "Fiona, do you remember my name?"
"Rebecca," she giggled.
"That's right," she smiled. "Nice seeing you again, Delilah," she said.
"It's not a good thing being here, Beck," I said.
"You're right... I'm sorry..."
"What does her chart say? How much longer does she need to do this?"
"Um...hold on..." she said as she flipped through Fiona's chart. "This is her last one," she smiled. "Congratulations Fiona," she said.
"Wait, really?" I cried.
"Yes...really,"
"Oh my god, congrats baby girl," I cheered as I kissed the back of her stubble filled head.
"Yay," she giggled.
"Hey, Becky-" dad started.
"Don't call me that," she chuckled. "What do you want, Phil?"
"A chair would be nice,"
"Of course," she smiled. "Fiona here's your bin. And Phil, I'll be right back with your chair,"
"Thank you," he said.
"Hey dad," I said. "Could you hand me my laptop and headphones?"
"Where are they?"
"My backpack,"

He unpacked the belongings and placed them on the portable table the hospital provided for us. He plugged in my laptop and handed me my headphones; I plugged them in and put them in Fiona's ears so she could be distracted for the two and a half hours. I continued bouncing her on my lap as she watched Winnie the Pooh on my laptop.

"Hey dad," I whispered.
"Yeah?"
"Could you be a peach and get me some coffee?"
"Sure," he said. "There's a Starbuck about a block away. Want some Starbucks coffee?"
"That would be amazing," I quietly cheered.
"Alright, I'll be back," he said as he got up from his chair.
"Thank you, daddy," I said with a teasing tone in my voice.
"Yeah, yeah," he sighed.

He walked out of the hospital while I stayed and comforted my scared little girl. We sat there, for about five minutes; then my phone buzzed.

Winnie: hey, you busy?
Delilah: I'm at Fiona's chemo appointment. What's up?
Winnie: I wanted to Skype
Delilah: why? Aren't you in school?
Winnie: lunch break. So, can you talk or no?
Delilah: Fiona has my laptop
Winnie: hold on
Delilah: for what?

Winnie is calling...

"What?"
"Hello to you too. May I talk to Fiona?"
"Sure," I said. I paused the show and took out her headphones; she just sighed and pouted. "Honey, say hi to uncle Winnie,"
"Hi uncle Winnie!" she yelled.
"Shhh," I whispered.
"Hi uncle Winnie," she quietly said.
"Hey princess! Would you mind if your mummy borrowed the laptop for a few minutes?"
"Why?"
"So I could talk to her,"
"Oh...okay..."
"You can have it as soon as she's done. I promise,"
"Okay," she said.
"Can I talk to your mum again?"
"Yes," she whispered. "Here mummy,"
"Thanks baby," I said. "What's up?"
"She said you can borrow the laptop. Give her your phone or something while we talk,"
"Why can't you talk over the phone?"
"Cause Stefnis here too-"
"Hello!"
"And she wants to talk as well," he chuckled.
"Fine," I said as I hung up. "Here baby, play with mummy's phone,"
"Okay," she said as she opened Crossy Road.

I logged onto Skype and popped my headphones in. I waited for a minute or two before Winston's name appeared on the screen.

"Hey," I said.
"Hi," he mumbled.
"How are you guys?"
"Scared," Stefanie said.
"Why?"
"The baby's still in my stomach... Anything could go wrong at any minute and I'm so scared," she cried.
"Stef," I sighed. "Maybe the doctor just misdiagnosed you. What if you can actually carry a baby to term?"
"I'm so scared..."
"Take a deep breath and calm down. You being stressed isn't good for the baby,"
"You're right...you're-" she paused. "Oh my god," she whispered.
"Is everything okay?"
"I-I, shit," she mumbled.
"Oh my god," Winston gasped. "Dil, we gotta go,"
"Why? What's wrong? Is every this okay? Someone, answer me..."
"I-I'm mis-shit!" Stefanie cried out. "It hurts so much, Winnie,"
"We have to go," Winston said as he hung up.
"Oh my god," I mumbled.
"Fiona, honey, look what I got for you at Starbucks," dad smiled as he handed her a teddy bear.
"He's squishy," she giggled as she hugged it.
"Here," dad said. "I got you a grande-"
"I gotta go," I mumbled as I put Winnie the Pooh back on for Fiona. "Fiona, baby, mummy's gotta go and see uncle Winnie," I said as I carefully got up from the chair. "I'm gonna call daddy and make sure he meets you here for the rest of your appointment,"
"Where are you going?" dad asked.
"Stef is hurt..." I said as I collected ny things. "I'm going to go see them and make sure they're okay. Give me your keys,"
"What do you mean she's hurt?"
"She's miscarrying. Give me your keys,"
"How will we get home?"
"Joe's gonna pick you up,"
"Okay," he whispered. "Send me a text. Make sure everyone okay,"
"Okay," I sighed. "Bye," I gave him a hug. "Princess, I'll be back in a day or two," I said as I kissed her cheek. "Be good for daddy. Oh, and I am so, so, proud of you. You are my brave little girl and I love you,"
"I love you too mummy," she giggled.
"Bye princess. I'll call you tonight,"
"Bye mummy," she waved as I walked out.

I ran outside to my car and immediately got it started. As the heat turned on, I slouched in my seat and started texting Winston.

Delilah: I'll be there soon. And I s2g. Keep. Her. Breathing.