"Do you feel like something's missing, when your skin is pressed to mine?" Ryan Ross asked quietly, his head lifting from Brendon Urie's chest.
"No. We've been through this Ry." The younger male said softly, moving a strand of hair away from Ryan's face.
"And honestly, I would whisper you a riot if you'd listen."
"Listen to what?" Ryan asked warily, and Brendon smirked slowly.
"To the sound that you've ignored a thousand times."
'Cause I am only me when
I'm without you,
"All I ever wanted was a part of you that I couldn't break! Ya know a piece of you that I couldn't take apart!" Ryan yelled later that day, tears streaming down his face as Brendon laughed once, a dry sound in the back of his throat.
"Yeah, well we're in pieces now. And to correct you, all you ever wanted was a part of me that I couldn't fake."
"I never made it easy to shape my heart Brendon." Ryan spat coldly, and Brendon crossed the room, placing his hand on the older man's chest above his heart.
"But it's not beating now Ry. And I'm sorry but I have to let you down." He whispered softly, grabbing his bag and leaving the room.
"There is ice in place of answers, and a cold that chills the bones, you realize that right?" Brendon asked a few months later, making Ryan's head snap up.
"Yeah, and September came and went without an answer, which was the month we agreed to actually sort shit out." Ryan shot back, making Brendon sigh.
"And now, I am only me when I'm without you."
I have to let you down.
"All I ever wanted was a part of you that I couldn't break. That piece of you that I couldn't take apart, yet it's too late. We're in pieces now." Ryan said from the door of their hotel room, Brendon looking up with a sour expression.
"Ryan, stop. We're in Cape Town for God's sake. We don't need to do this." He said softly, sitting up from the bed as Ryan took a suitcase from the closet, throwing his clothes in it before latching it shut.
"It's like before, I never made it easy to shape my heart, but, like you said it's not beating now." He said softly, opening the door and then turning to meet Brendon's eyes.
"I have to let you down." He whispered, walking out and shutting the door behind him.
I had to and I regret nothing.
