Destiny's Gamble

The Start Of Something New

"Nandini, could you please hand me the other stack of plates? They're near the stove." Shagun calls out to me from the compound. 

"S-Sure!" I say distractedly, my eyes trained towards the school gates. A tearing sound enters my ears. I look down to find the hem of my kameez in between my fingers, shreds of cloth hanging loosely from it. Aiyappa, isn't there a cure for this anxiety? I mean, can't You just make Manik walk through those gates right now with Ira and her children? 

"Nandini!" Shagun's voice snaps me out of my thoughts, making me head into the kitchen. It began pouring the second Manik set off in his boat. I stayed on the bank until I could no longer see him, and then returned back to the school grounds. It has been about an hour since Manik left and the rain has stopped mere minutes back. Aiyappa, I really hope my husband's okay. It seemed as if he was managing the boat just fine, but during such a weather, the river has a mind of its own, thereby controlling the boat and the passengers in it.

I carry the stack of plates out into the compound and hand them to Shagun, who takes them gratefully. Distracting myself turned out to be an epic failure, so by now I've simply given up. Sighing, I seat myself in a corner of the compound, and rest my head against the wall; my eyes stuck to the gates. Any longer and I fear my heart will give up due to tension. 

"Here!" Rakesh's excited voice jerks me back to life. "Superman's come!" Without skipping a beat, I bound out of the compound. He's standing in the middle of the ground, his eyes trained towards a spot in the distance. I follow his gaze to find three silhouettes making their way towards us. 

"Manik," I whisper, grinning, as I bolt towards my husband. Manik's tired face lightens up with a grin as he sees me approaching. Unable to apply the brakes of my feet, my front slams into his, causing him to stumble back a few steps.

"Easy there," Manik says. His arms wrap around my back, as I rest my head against his chest, taking in his scent. Good God, I've missed this man. 

"Nandini, this one helped us out a great deal." Ira says, reminding me that we have company. I step back reluctantly, my eyes flitting over her elder son and the little one in her arms. They both seem free of any injury whatsoever. "Without Manik, I don't think we'd have been able to make it back." She looks at him appreciatively. "Thank you, Superman." 

"I'm just glad you all are back safe and sound." I say, falling into stride beside Manik, as we head towards the school. My fingers find the spaces between his once more, squeezing them tightly. Aiyappa, this is reality, right? This time, it feels as if I'm in a dream. I stop, tugging on Manik's hand to make him halt as well. I watch Ira's back as she moves a good distance ahead of us. 

I nod my head towards the left, pulling Manik behind me, as I guide the way. We near an old bench, the state of this structure saying it has almost given up completely. I take a seat and pat the space beside me, silently telling Manik to join me. He stares at the wet wood unsurely.

"Manik, we're already dripping." I point out, nodding towards his soaked clothes. Giving a light shrug, my husband lowers himself beside me. 

"What're we doing here?" He asks, turning his head towards me. 

"I had a lot of time to think while you were out playing Superman," I begin. "I know it was only an hour or so, but for a woman whose mind and stomach is in knots, this time is enough." I stop and brace myself for my next words. "Firstly, I want to apologize for my outburst. My words held truth to them, but I wish I had put them forth in a more decent manner." Manik opens his mouth to say something, but I raise my palm, his words dying in his throat. "Let me finish. Please." He nods, allowing me to go on.

"Love isn't supposed to be selfish," I continue. "But I feel like that's exactly how I behaved. I mean, your past is something I can't even remotely imagine, so who am I to judge for the person it has made you into." I can see that Manik is struggling to keep his words in, but this time instead of the two of us firing away at each other without getting anywhere, I need to finish with my words.

"All your life you've waited, Manik." I say, not meeting his gaze, for I fear that if I look into his black orbs, then I'll lose the courage to utter these words that need to be voiced out loud. "For others, for love and to get what you deserve. However, now I will wait for you." I moisten my lips, guilt filling every pore of my body. If only I could've controlled myself back in the day, instead of acting out like a selfish brat.

 "I don't wish to force you into handing over your heart, especially when it's not ready. You can't imagine just how sorry I am for blowing up on you today. Us isn't just about my comfort, or wishes. It's about you and I, working together like the partners we are. This is why I'm saying, I'll wait. For however long it takes you to come running into my always open arms. I am, after all, your wife, where will I go?" I let out a bark of laughter, nervousness evident in the waver of it.

Only Aiyappa knows what's going on in Manik's head and the thought is nerve-racking. As a ray of sunlight falls across my face, I look up towards the sky with squinted eyes. Smiling, I squeeze Manik's hand and nod my chin towards the Sun. It is making an appearance from behind the clouds.

"See, Manik, there's always sunshine after a storm." Smiling, I stand up, enjoying the warm rays on my face after these few hours of chill. I raise Manik's palm towards my lips and place a kiss at the center of it. I let it go and turn around, heading towards the school.

"I-I need time to think." Manik calls from behind me. 

"And I've got an entire lifetime to wait." I say, without turning around or stopping.

*****

"Angel," Manik's voice penetrates my sleep. Without turning around, I let out a soft hum in my throat, making him aware of the fact that I'm half asleep. "I have something to say." There's a tremble in his voice that alerts me at once. Hurriedly, I turn around and sit up. Manik is on his knees at the side of the bed. The entire room is blanketed in complete darkness, except for a sliver of moonlight that's falling on the left side of Manik's face. A trail of liquid is glistening on his cheek. 

"I'm not human. I've not been for many years now." Manik's voice cracks towards the end, a sniffle echoing around the quiet room. "Please make me one." My palms cup his cheeks at once, the skin getting damp with his tears.

"Teach me. Please." A couple more tears slip out of his eyes. 

"Manik, I love you." I whisper, my own eyes filling up. "And that's not a bad thing." My husband smiles through his pain, but it doesn't reach his eyes.

"I don't quite agree with you," he says. 

"Yet," I add. Manik watches me, a droplet hanging at the tip of his eyelash. I slide over to one side of the bed and nod towards the mattress. Without uttering a word, my husband climbs onto the bed, turning his back towards me. 

"Yet," he murmurs after a few seconds.