I'll Keep This Secret For You

Chapter 101

Warning: It's time for some long overdue smut!!!!

I don't stop running until I get to the front path of our house, lit up by the light on the front porch. I'm desperate to get inside and see my family, but I don't even get to the front door before (Y/N) opens it and comes flying out to me. In fact I hardly even see her before she's at me because I'm too busy wiping the sweat off my brow.

"James!" She exclaims as she runs straight into my chest.

"Doll? What's wrong?" I puff concerned as I wrap my arms around her.

"Nothing." She mumbles into my chest. "You're home safe, that's all."

"What do you mean?" I chuckle and look down at the top of her head. "Of course I am."

"Peggy called me ages ago to make sure you got home okay. But you weren't home yet." She looks up at me.

I look at her confused as to why she's so concerned. "Yeah Sorry, I just went for a run. Its been a rough day. But then I realised that I wanted nothing more than to see you and the kids."

"Well I hate to disappoint you but they're all in bed now." She states.

"What?" I frown.

"Buck," she says hesitantly. "It's 8:30pm. You must've been out there running for like 3 hours."

"Wow. Are you serious? Guess I was angrier than I thought. I thought I was only like an hour. Sorry doll," I say incredulously.

"It's okay Buck. I'm just glad you're home safe now. What had you so worked up?" She asks softly and strokes my face.

"Just everything." I sigh. "Steve's recovery is going to be really long and hard and I know he's going to hate it. And then I'm so frustrated that it's so easy for me to be turned back into the Winter Soldier. According to Steve it just took a few words, but clearly that isn't going to be an easy fix though."

"Aw Buck." She pouts. "Yes Steve's recovery will be hard but I'm sure he's up for the challenge and willing to take it on. As for you, it's inhumane what was done to you so don't ever feel like your easily broken because that shouldn't happen to anyone. But what do you mean by a few simple words?"

I huff and look up at the stars. "Steve said that the guy was speaking Russian to me to trigger me but Steve doesn't know Russian and I have no recollection of what he said, not that I know Russian myself either anyway. And I just thought that maybe if we knew what they did we could find a way to fix it. But I guess that's not gonna happen any time soon now."

"Hey. It's okay." She whispers and pulls my chin down to look at her. "One day we will figure this out and you will get the life you deserve one million times over."

Her eyes look so innocent and sincere that I just feel myself warming up. "Thanks doll. Seriously. And I'm sorry I was out so long. You know what happens I just let things get the best of me and I get so worked up and have to like burn it off."

"I know, like I said, its okay. Now if you want to, quickly go kiss the kids goodnight. If your lucky Luke might still be awake reading. I'll fix you some dinner." She smiles at me before going up on her tip toes to peck me on the lips.

"Thanks doll." I mumble against her noticeably cold lips and hug her one more time. "Now get inside, you're freezing."

"That's funny, cos you're boiling." She grins up at me.

"That's what going for a marathon run will do to you guess." I smirk.

We pull away from each other and head inside before parting ways. First I go to Theo's room and lean down to kiss his already sleeping form goodnight. I stroke a few tufts of his soft, fair hair from his forehead and look at his innocent face before leaving for the older two's room.