(The trio is on a cruise ship)
Harry: I... don't think this was a very good idea Ma-
Manny: YOU WEREN'T A VERY GOOD IDEA!
Harry: I know...
Manny: NONONONONONO! I'M SORRY! It's just...we a fuck ton of money on this cruise thing.
Harry: It's fine! It's just... I'm trying to relax after all that happened but... it's not really working...
Manny: Well I mean this relaxing vacation to the middle of the ocean could have been worse. We could've sunk the ship. Or it could've been raining. Or my dad could pull himself out of the ocean and try to have sex with you-
Roy: *jumps onto boat* BOOM! SUP BITCHES!
Manny: GOD FUCKING DAMN IT!
Harry: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH-
Roy: Oh, hey Harry.
Harry: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH-
Roy: Uh how are you doing?
Harry: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH-
Roy: I like your hair. Did you do something with it today?
Harry: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH-
Manny: You gave us PTSD! He doesn't want to fuck you!
Roy: BITCH SLAP! *slaps Manny out of the way*
Manny: OHH-!
Roy: *grabs Harry's hand with both of his hands* Harry, will you, *drops to his knees* fUCK ME SIDEWAYS ALL OVER THIS BOATS DECK!?
(Cue dramatic thunder)
Harry: What...?
Roy: C'mon, I've been craving your sopping wetness ever since that annoying bird took you away from me! It felt so WRONG but it felt so RIGHT! I need you inside me Harry! I thought I was a brute, but you, you're a monster!
(Cue dramatic thunder again)
Manny: That's pretty hot, but he's obviously not interested!
Roy: BITCH SLAP! *slaps Manny again*
Manny: SHIT!
Harry: W-Why would I have sex with you IN THE MIDDLE OF THE FUCKING OCEAN!?!?
Roy: Better question: Why WOULDN'T you?
Harry: Good point but-
Manny: Harry is abstinent!
Roy: BIIITCH...slap. *Jesus is this the third slap?*
Manny: OH, FUCK!
Harry: I'm not abstinent. I'm just not interested.
Roy: But Harry I-!
Harry: Shut the fuck up about you changing! You said that 5 times while you held us captive!
Roy: We made a deal!
Harry: I STILL WANTED MY OWN KELP SHAKE DAMMIT!
Manny: What in the actual fuck-
Roy: Look babe, *falls to his knees again* marry me!
Harry: What?!
Roy: I know it's sudden, but I really want it spent the rest of my pathetic life humping you on my couch!
Harry: What!?!?
(Harry looks at Manny and back at Roy)
Harry: I'll answer that proposal with a song.
Roy: What?
Harry: Ahem.
Ring around the Rosie,
Pocket full of posies,
Ashes ashes,
We all FUCKING DIE! *punches Roy off the the boat*
Roy: FIST ME DADDYyyyyy...*falls into water*
Manny: *runs to hug Harry* Was that a no?
Harry: It was vague, thinking about it.
Robin: *runs over to them* WHAT in the HELL was tha-!
(It starts to rain)
Harry: Uhhhhhh
Manny: Oh fuck it did start to rain.
(FIN.)
YOU ARE READING
Dhmis one-shots
FanfictionRead the title Send requests! Votes are appreciated! A/N: This book was made before the series so the stories won't be associated with it unless I explicitly say so
