Behind The Scenes

60. Hero

I knew it. I knew something had happened between them. I was right to doubt him. But I didn't doubt Jo... I trusted her.
She looks at me in shock as I put my boxers back on shaking my head, she doesn't speak. Of course, she has no excuses.
"I trusted you." I leave the pool and wrap a towel around my waist.
"Hero, wait." She puts her panties back on and covers herself with a towel. She follows me and takes me by the wrist.
"I don't know what to think of you anymore... You go around... kissing people, while I give you all my heart."
Her face fills with tears. "I swear to you, on what you want. I didn't kiss him, I don't even like him."
"I saw how you looked at him..." I walk back and forth around the small warm room, running my hands through my damp hair.
She gives a giggle and then she cries again. "What? What are you saying? Hero you have lost your mind!" she yells at her.
"No, you've lost your mind!" How could she kiss Liam? Fuck!
She approaches me and starts to touch my arms. But I move away immediately. "Please leave me alone," I burst out.
She sighs and moves her hair back nervously. "Oh my God. Hero, I haven't kissed anyone! This is a trap."
A trap?
She continues, "I saw the way Jessica looked at you. She was flir—"
I interrupt her, "She literally told me you fucking kissed him!"
"Why can't you just trust me?" she follows me as I wander around the room.
"I do trust you! You know I trust you!"
Or at least... I trusted.
She laughs. "Oh no, now you're trusting Jessica and not me! Do you realize Hero?" she shakes her head.
What the fuck is she laughing?
"Yes. It's not the first time this has happened."
I remember very well when she kissed a guy in the club, and she only told me because she was drunk, otherwise I never would have known, I know.
"Yes, but that was different... and you know it," she lowers her eyes and voice.
If she kissed him, she did it in the afternoon, when I left her at home to get dressed while I went to get the car... of course.
"You kissed him, say it ahead."
She snorts. "Oh God! How should I tell you? I haven't done anything!"
"Look, you piss me off more if you don't tell me than..." I start to say.
"I told you I didn't do anything! Why do you say you trust me when you don't?" she asks me, with a hint of sadness in her voice.
"Well, I don't trust you. Is this what you wanted to hear?" I retort sharply.
She bursts into sobs and leans against the pool, barely supporting herself. "If that's the truth... then yes."
I still walk back and forth around the room as I ponder what to say or do.
But I can't think before I speak, so I burst out, "Last time you just told me because you were drunk."
She frowns, and sniffles. "What?"
"Yes, you heard."
She moves away from there and comes towards me. She stands in front of me and takes my hands, this time I allow her to touch me. My fingers tremble in her hands. She looks me in the eyes, sorry, sorry for me.
"Look at me," she says softly.
I look at her.
"Touch my heart," she takes one of my hands and places it on her chest, on the left.
I touch her heart.
"Now listen to my voice."
I listen to it.
"I didn't kiss Liam, and he didn't kiss me. You know I would never cheat on you, I love you too much to be able to do that," she says slowly, calmly and confidently. "Jessica was definitely drunk, she doesn't know what she is saying. Call Liam, ask him."
I don't even think about it. I don't call him, that asshole.
"No," I reply. "I don't know what to think... how do I know you're not lying?"
She sighs. "You heard my voice, the beating of my heart, you looked me in the eye. Did it seem like I lied?" Her lips tremble, she's about to cry again.
You're a fucking actress, I'd like to tell her.
I look down, I can't look at her anymore.
"You're going crazy," she tells me, looking at me with pity. "Sit down, relax for a moment."
I sit by the pool and rest my elbows on my knees, I hold my head in my hands.
Jo strokes the tight muscles in my back. She distracts me. "Stop it, please," and she quickly retracts her hands.
She may be honest, but I can't be 100 percent sure. I'll call Liam when I'm alone, when she can't hear me. Maybe Jessica was really drunk. But I know that guy attracts her, and she can't be blamed, but fuck, he makes me feel insecure of myself.
After five minutes spent in dead silence, I get up from her and take her hand to help her get to her feet. "Get dressed, let's go home. My head explodes, we'll talk about it tomorrow."
She sighs, dejected, and she goes to put on her slightly damp dress.
Once dressed we leave The Rooftops, now empty, and get in the car.
Neither of us talks, she glances at me every now and then, I don't. She puts her hand on mine on the shifter, but I move it right away.
"Oh well..." she sighs again and looks out the window.
I snort irritated.
When we get home, the first thing I do is take my clothes off and put on a pair of dry boxers. I don't have the strength to take a shower and I'm right under the sheets. I stare at the ceiling.
Jo has changed as well, and she is now under the covers next to me, but far away. I hate this distance, but we have to keep it.
"Goodnight," and she turns on her side, her back to me.
I have never felt so confused.
My mind and heart haunt every nerve in me for her.