Omelette

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Omelette you suck on deez nutz.

Y/n's pov

What the hell even is my life? I think I'm in shock.

"Mom, you want some cake?" Kasumi asks shoving a piece in my face.

Oh shit, we're already on cake?

"Hey hey hey, Y/n," Bokuto says. "How's the fam been?"

Oh, and more party guests, that's fun.

"I guess you didn't get any height from your dad," Atsumu laughs. "And man is he scary."

Oh yeah, I have a dad. And he's actually really nice, dumb like me, but nice.

"You're just mad because he's taller," Kasumi says. "The tallest person I've ever met, even taller than my dad. He could beat up Christopher, I like Hyun, he can be my bodyguard."

"Who's gonna beat me up?" Christopher asks.

"Hyun," Kasumi says. "And you're late to my birthday party, I need a good reason or you can excuse yourself."

"Who's Hyun?" Christopher asks.

"Uh, I'm Hyun," he says. "Are you Wakatoshi?"

"No you idiot," Marigold says. "Does he look like Wakatoshi to you?"

"What? I was told Wakatoshi was the big guy," he says. "This guy is buff."

"I am Wakatoshi," yes, joining the party why don't you. "It's nice to meet you."

"I thought he was the boyfriend," Hyun says.

"I'm the boyfriend," Kei says.

"Ah," Hyun nods his head. "Glasses is the boyfriend, stoic is the brother, and buff is the... other brother?"

"I'm Christopher," he says. "And you are Hyun."

"Oh yeah, I'm Y/n's dad," he says. "And uh, the two scary middle-aged women are her mothers."

"I think I missed a few chapters," he says.

"Oh come with me," Kasumi says. "Dai and I will give you the rundown."

"Sure," he says following her away.

"Come with me you Buffon," Marigold says dragging Hyun away.

"And you can come with me," Kei says dragging me off away from everyone else.

Thank god, I needed some air.

"Are you alright?" he asks. "You look dazed."

"Y'know, every year up until the six grade I wished for a dad," I say. "Did you know that?"

"No, I didn't," he says.

"I'm just really happy to know who my parents are, well even though my mom is still my mom. It makes me feel better knowing that I wasn't an abandoned baby," I say. "And that I have a dad... Fuck, I'm sorry."

"What?" he asks. "If you're apologizing because my dad was some deadbeat guy, don't."

"You never talked about your dad before," I say.

"There's not much to talk about," he says. "I barely remember him, he was in the military and enjoyed sleeping with girls when he was drafted to Korea."

"Guss you guys both have a thing for Koreans," I laugh. "Wait, I'm sorry, that was a bad joke. Please ignore me, I'm sorry."

"It was kinda funny," he laughs.

"Anyway, my dad is taller than I thought he'd be," I say. "He's six-nine, a real beast."

"Yeah, and Marigold is taller than you so I guess you really are underdeveloped," he says.

"Shut up," I shove him. "I am not."

"Those mosquito bites say otherwise," he laughs again.

"They are perfectly average," I say. "And maybe our kids will be unlucky and get my average height too, so then what, you're gonna bully them too?"

"I do not bully you," he says.

"Okay, you don't," I say. "But still."

"And did you just imply that we will be having more kids together in the future?" he asks.

"I did not," I shake my head. "Premarital sex is a sin."

"You didn't seem to think that last night," he says.

"I'm going inside," I say. "You are being a hoe, plus Kasumi is probably running around starting fires. And I'm starving, and yeah... You're a whore."

"Oh shut up," he says. "If I'm" a whore what does that make you?"

"Wow, now you're slut-shaming me?" I ask. "Woooow."

"Your mood swings are giving me whiplash," he says.

"Oh yeah, well I bet Newton got whiplash when the apple hit his head," I say.

"Do not start with that Newton crap again," he says cracking a smile.

Oh, but I had already started, there was no avoiding the swarm of stupidity and laughter that follwed.


Can't wait for school to start.

-Crouton

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