Ruin

25

Sunday: 12:19 P. M.
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It's the second time that I'm left feeling like a damn fool because of this man.

I don't know how I'd let it happen.

It just did.

But as they say, fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Fool me three times?

Thump mi in a mi rass back!

I don't know what I'd expected. That just because he'd fucked me, I was suddenly important to him?

Of course not. You're just some easy pussy to pass his time.

Damn.

I must admit that hurts. Although while it seems harsh, it's the truth.

And it's as plain as day.

I push the sunken feeling away before it consumes me, and look over at the man beside me whose attention is fixed on the road ahead.

His jaw muscles tense, and his hands grip the staring wheel so tightly I fear he'll break it.

Why is he angry?

If anything, I should be angry at him.

I'm the one who's left embarrassed and feeling like a useless piece of shit.

TV?

The fuck.

TV, like yuh mumma!

Fucking bright!

But I can't seem to get as angry as I'd like.

Hurt yes.

In fact, I'm fucking hurt! But not angry.

The moment he'd gripped my hand back there, sending chills up my spine, all the rage I'd felt had dissipated.

And I was left feeling needy. Pitiful. Weak.

Why am I like this?

It's so confusing.

Lord help me. For I know I shouldn't be feeling this way about this man.

Not when I have a boyfriend.

Not when he has a girlfriend.

Right...

That's what had hurt me the most. The fact that I was intervening in someone else's love life.

I'm no homewrecker.

A cheat. Yes. Now.

But not a skank.

Boo, you whore!

It makes me feel cheap. Especially, when I shouldn't have been in a situation like this to begin with.

It's too complex.

Lucas made it clear when he couldn't even admit what he'd done.

Did he feel guilty?

Of course he does, I can't blame him.

He's human too.

I just don't appreciate how he'd gone about it.

Like you wouldn't do the same thing if it were Odaine who had called.

See how unuh women unfair?

Yuh know the man have a woman, yet yuh still decide fi fling the pussy pon him and now a bawl when him disown yuh to him woman.

Wah yuh did expect?