Ruin

86

Sunday: 3 A.M.
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I can't sleep.

My mind is reeling.

Despite being wrapped in Lucas' comforting arms, I'm uncomfortable. I can't seem to get my mind to relax. Or, at least, settle long enough for me to fall asleep.

A frustrated sigh leaves my lips in the form of hot air.

"Luke?" I say when I can't bear it any longer.

"Hmm?" his smooth voice comes from behind me.

"Are you sleeping?"

Duh!

He pauses. "No."

He's lying. I could hear his soft snores, just now.

"Wah do yuh?"

I turn around, in his arms, to face him. Peering up at his handsome face, I tell him, "I can't sleep."

He shuffles, and I move my head for him to fix his arm. It must've been cramping by now. He sniffles. "Wah deh pon yuh mind?"

A lot!

Despite laying on my side, I shrug. "Just a think 'bout everything weh yuh tell me since night."

"Amanda..."

Reaching out, I gently stroke his beard. I miss it when it was longer. "No, mi nawh dwell pon it or nuttn eno. Mi just did a think."

I definitely am overthinking. But, I can't tell him that. I know he'll regret telling me if I do.

"What exactly are you thinking?" His voice is low and raspy and sounds so, so sexy.

I sigh and clear my throat in an effort to clear the naughty thoughts that have surfaced in my head at the sound of his voice. I'm horny as hell, too. And, I think that's also a part of the reason I'm having trouble sleeping. "I just feel bad that you've gone through so much...and, I didn't even know."

I really do feel bad.

A heavy sigh leaves his lips. "That's OK, Amanda. Everything happens for a reason."

Does it?

Or, did it happen because some people decided to meddle in business that wasn't theirs?

I subconsciously continue to stroke his beard. "I just think it's unfair how people can ruin people's lives just so though."

It makes me sick to my stomach when I think about it.

My mind drifts to stinking pussy Shantae and man-body Ashley, and I internally scoff.

Some gyal definitely nuh have nuh life eno.

Or, nuh shame tree.

When desperation did a give weh, them head, middle, and end the line to rahtid.

Yack!

He chuckles bitterly but says nothing further.

"You OK?" I ask, sensing the shift in the atmosphere.

"Mi good, man. Just a think, yuzeet."

Mi nuh like the sound a that...

"Wah you a think 'bout?" I ask what's on my mind.

I don't like when he gets in his shell like this. After his being so open tonight, I've gotten to realize that I like him better when he's vocal.

"Life," is his simple response.