Ruin

100

Friday: 2:25 P.M.
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Sherice, Shane, Jade——another one of my coworker who's a part of the Brokerage team——and I are sitting in the lunchroom, eating and chatting, when my phone goes off, interrupting the conversation.

For some reason, my heart skips a beat when I see the caller ID. But I quickly wipe my hand and slide the screen up to take the call.

Clearing my throat, I say an uncertain, "Hello?"

"Manda, evening," my mother's voice, which comes through the speakers, says. "Yuh alright?"

My heart skips another beat.

Awah now?

Mi nuh know why, but, whenever Mummy calls mi like this, mi always get an anxious feeling say sum'n bad happen.

My mind automatically runs on my father and siblings.

Shuffling on the stool I'm sitting on, I clear my throat. "Yes, Mummy. Just a get a chance fi eat some food, but I'm OK for the most part. Awah?"

"Oh. Aii," she says, and I can hear the clear relief in her voice, "that's all mi waan know. 'Cause whole morning mi deh ya, mi mind a run pon you and mi nuh stop fret say sum'n happen."

That nuh sound safe...

"Oh," I pause and inhale a silent breath to tame my racing heartbeat. Then assure her that, "Well, I'm OK. So stop worry up yuhself."

My mother chuckles, and I adjust the air pod in my left ear while I use the fork, in my free hand, to pick at the pasta in my plate, absentmindedly.

"Mi cyaa help it, mi gyal. When mi get the feeling dem weh bother mi mind, mi affi mek sure all is well. 'Cause the devil is running rampant nowadays."

True.

I hum, picking up a forkful of curried goat and stuffing the fork into my opened mouth.

All waah gwaan mi not even have no appetite fi this eno. And I don't know why.

"By the way," Mummy's voice brings my focus back on her, "yuh hear from Lucas?"

LUCAS?

Now, my heart practically leaps in my chest.

Mi hear from him this morning, so mi nuh know why mi so nervous at the mention of his name.

Regardless, I say, "No, from he texted me, this morning, that he was on his way home, I haven't heard back from him. Why?"

My mind flashes back to the text he sent me that he wasn't feeling well so he was leaving work early, and I internally sigh.

Now that mi really think of it, it's funny how him nuh text mi back since that, as that's unlike him...but I guess he's probably really sick.

Mi might affi go stop over him yard later, if anything.

I sigh, suddenly feeling unsettled.

All waah gwaan, mi just hope ano noth'n serious.

'Cause mi can't bother with the stress.

I'm not used to it; mi can count the amount of times mi ever hear tha man deh say him sick, pon one hand.

Worse mi always hear them say when people who nuh sicky-sicky get sick them always de--no, scratch that...mi not even a go deh so.

"Mi deh ya a pray fi the two a uno whole morning," Mummy says, bringing me out of my thoughts and back to the conversation. "Mi all send him a prayer voice note pon WhatsApp and see say him read it, but mi nuh get back no text from him. So mi did worried."